How do i address my invitations to family members who have adult children living in the same household?

Are you stating in your invite that there are no kids invited? Make sure to note that so it's not confusing for the last part where it would state "Mr. & Mrs. John & Jane Doe + Family". Hopefully they understand that part.

If anything you can state everyone's names on the card that ARE invited and they can check on who is coming. Not sure if that's doable or it would just take too much time..

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Yep! There's a separate card with additional info that says "with respect, while we love little ones, we haven chosen for our wedding to be an adult only (18+) event." With that in mind, none of the adult children (aka, our generation of cousins) who live with their parents have their own children.

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Got it! So, as long as you state no kids they SHOULD understand that there are no kids allowed especially if you are stating it in a separate card to notify your guests.

Let's say you address it to your your uncle and aunt (uncle john and aunt jane). They have three kids total, but two are under 18 and one is 19. Therefore, that 19 year old is allowed to go because he/she is an adult. Therefore, you can state your uncle and aunt + family member. But if you have room to state the actual names then that would be easier for THEM. I'm SURE someone may still have a question or not follow what it says or may assume you can make an exception lol. But that is why you are doing RSVP cards so you know and you can follow up if need be

You would probably want a separate line underneath with the names of the kids who are invited. Example:

Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Doe

Jack and Jill Doe

Adult children should actually receive their own invitation. If you aren’t doing that, I’d include their name on the envelope so there’s no confusion.

View Quoted Comment I agree, I would send any children living at home over the age of 18 their own invitation, so as to limit confusion. If you would like to just send one invitation per household though, I would put each specific persons name who IS invited on the envelope.

This is not customary but I did:


John, Jane, Mary and Steve Doe
I just wrote out all the names!

View Quoted Comment This is what I’m doing as well.

Adults children get their own invite so there isn't any confusion.

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I suppose this makes sense if there's only one adult child living with their parents, but what if there's more? It seems monotonous to send four invitations to one household if there's my aunt + uncle in addition to three of their kids who are respectively 18, 19, and 21, you know?

View Quoted Comment This is what I would suggest as well.

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Oh I like this! There's no room for interpretation this way Thank you!!

View Quoted Comment I totally get it. We had that situation with our adult nieces and nephews. Even though everyone from their families were invited each one got their own invitations so yeah we had 3 or 4 going to one house. Listing 4 or 5 names on an envelope can take up a lot of space and people may not pay attention to who is listed or not.

I need help with my wedding

Adult children get their own invites. You can address the save the date to everyone (specific names) or just send a phone call.


Be specific on the website or word of mouth that kids aren’t invited but don’t say anything on the save the date. Be clear on the reply card and outer envelope who is invited. You get in touch immediately with anyone who fails to read it correctly and invites extra guests.
By only acknowledging engaged/married couples, you are sending the unspoken message that other serious relationships aren’t good enough. Also a plus one is a random stranger, not a significant other regardless of the time they have been together.
“And family” on the envelope means that you are inviting children under 18. Bypass that by giving the adult child their own invitation.