Haley
Savvy October 2020

How are you affording this?

Haley, on September 22, 2019 at 11:37 AM Posted in Planning 1 66
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I have been struggling a lot recently with planning mostly because I feel like we cannot afford anything! We live in NC but are planning our wedding in NJ because it is where 95% of our family and friends are. I have reached out to probably 30 or 40 venues and there are some beautiful ones but they are ranging between 120-200 a person. We just do not have that sort of money as we are doing this all on our own. My FH is a LEO and does not make much, and I make less than him. We are cutting costs in our daily routine but I still feel like we will not be able to have the wedding I envision. I know there are some venues we can afford but I am being very picky. Am I being unrealistic and should I just accept that we cannot have a dream wedding or can we manage on a small budget?

66 Comments

Latest activity by Amanda, on September 27, 2019 at 6:49 AM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    If your budget can’t accommodate the wedding you want right now, you could consider pushing it back while you save more money.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    VIP December 2019
    Michelle ·
    • Flag

    I'm sorry but I may be a little confused. You said he's a LEO? Like as in his astrological sign???

    • Reply
  • Mrs. S
    Master November 2019
    Mrs. S ·
    • Flag
    I’ve been saving for 2 years...it’s a struggle
    • Reply
  • Haley
    Savvy October 2020
    Haley ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    It stands for law enforcement officer
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Master July 2019
    Hannah Online ·
    • Flag
    Yeah, NJ is unfortunately very, very expensive. We were only able to afford our wedding because both of our parents chipped in as well. Honestly, your best bet is to have it in NC or cut the guest list a lot. Also, in my experience, those pp estimates didn't include taxes and fees, so they were not the true per person cost estimate.
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    VIP October 2021
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag
    Look in Upstate NY for places.... they can be cheaper and close to the family.
    • Reply
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
    • Flag
    We had our reception at a holiday inn in southern NJ and got the cost down to $91/pp incl. Taxes and it covered a lot of the reception things (food, wedding cake, open beer and wine package, centerpieces and an added on mashed potato bar)
    • Reply
  • Alyssa
    Super December 2021
    Alyssa ·
    • Flag
    Ask if doing it on a less popular day like a Monday or doing only beer and wine would decrease cost. Maybe off season. Maybe a morning wedding. But also, you have to do guest cuts to really save.
    • Reply
  • Haley
    Savvy October 2020
    Haley ·
    • Flag
    😩 I would love to be able to cut the guest list but I have a huge family, just my side is about 70 people and he has a extended family whose weddings we attended so we feel obligated to invite.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    VIP December 2019
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    OHHHHHHH LOLOLOL I was like what does himm being a LEO have to do with anything. I am dying over here right now. I am so slow lolSmiley laugh

    • Reply
  • Michelle
    VIP December 2019
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    I agree with pp. I am from Baltimore but live in NC and we're having it here to keep cost down and I think I got a really good deal

    • Reply
  • Melle
    Legend June 2019
    Melle ·
    • Flag
    I took on a side job and for six months although it was a lot of work and super tiring, it pretty much paid for my half of the wedding. He did the same too.
    But I think I agree with the other PPs in that you can cut costs down by getting a community center and bringing in cheaper catering options like Mexican or Italian and cutting guest lists if possible. Or if even that is too much it's totally ok to have a wedding later on Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Samantha
    VIP October 2020
    Samantha ·
    • Flag
    NJ is a very expensive wedding area. I’m getting married in Indiana and we’re still feeling financial pressure. Weddings are crazy expensive! But you absolutely can do it on a smaller budget. I would urge you to rethink reciprocal invites, just because you were invited to a wedding doesn’t mean you need to invite someone. Their finances and even your relationship at the time of their wedding are likely different. We’re keeping the guest list small, which is a great way to cut costs. We’re also only doing wine and beer, we’re not having programs, no DOC, no favors, no florals in the centerpieces, a buffet, and we found two nice but relatively inexpensive venues. I’d much rather downsize than push my wedding date, but as others have mentioned that is an option. It’s not the wedding I planned on Pinterest but it will be beautiful and at the end of the day spending more won’t make me any more married.
    • Reply
  • M
    VIP September 2019
    Mrs. Bubba ·
    • Flag
    Take a deep breath and relax.

    First, make a list of what you need as far as decorations, 💐s, etc...

    Then, determine which of those that you can complete realistically via diy.
    • Reply
  • Ivy ORP
    VIP October 2019
    Ivy ORP ·
    • Flag

    We also live in an expensive area. We cut our guest list and cut it even more to fit our venue's capacity. This meant leaving a lot of people we love off the guest list but we have found ways to let them know how much they mean to us. We found a non-traditional venue and are working with friends of friends to hire photographers and caterers. We skipped most of the decorations, all the flowers, the DJ, and bought our attire online for much less than we would have paid in boutiques. I'm also doing my own make-up and my friend just offered to do my hair as a wedding gift. We don't have a lot, but are comfortable. We sold a bit of stock to pay off the big things, but we are just making the wedding we want in a way we can afford. It is not exactly easy but it can be done.

    • Reply
  • Laura
    Master October 2019
    Laura ·
    • Flag

    We barely are, and our budget is a lot smaller than most. My saving help has been Amazon. I do only surveys and stuff and have for years. Normally just cashed in for grocery cards, but i've been cashing them in the for wedding since I don't work. I didn't want my FH to have to pay for everything.

    • Reply
  • D
    Super September 2019
    Dana ·
    • Flag
    You definitely dont want to go into debt for a wedding. I would do what you can afford
    • Reply
  • Tiffany
    Dedicated June 2021
    Tiffany ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I thought the same thing lmaooo I saw LEO I’m like wait I’m a leo what does that have to do with anything lol
    • Reply
  • Tiffany
    Dedicated June 2021
    Tiffany ·
    • Flag
    If you can’t afford your dream wedding now I’d postpone it until you can or have an intimate wedding inviting only those closest to you and then have a party later
    • Reply
  • Tina
    VIP March 2020
    Tina ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Don't worry, it was my first thought too! 😂
    • Reply

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