Hors d'oeuvres?

If people are flying in you need to serve a full meal.

That's what I thought, but FH is convinced that's not necessary.

What time does the reception start and what are the Hors D'oeuvres? Heavy apps could work but honestly to have enough appetizer stations for people to actually get full is probably going to cost more than a buffet style dinner.

You need to serve a full meal.

I think this style of reception is fine, as long as you have enough food that it is a full meal for everyone. I'm not a catering expert, but some sources I've seen suggest 10-20 pieces per guest, spread across a variety of hot and cold dishes.

ETA: This will probably not be cheaper than a standard dinner and could cost quite a bit more.

You said an abundance of smaller items. I think as long as your guests are not going hungry, serve the food you want in the style you want. I personally think having food served this way allows for more mingling among guests especially when so many are coming from out of town. Include some interesting icebreaker questions or make some other communication activity to encourage guests to talk and meet each other.

If it's in the evening during dinner hours you need to serve a full meal.

To have enough to make a full meal, you're going to pay more than you would with a standard plated or buffet dinner.

If you have alcohol you need to have a full meal.

I would not be happy if I flew in for a wedding and didn't get a dinner during an evening wedding.

This is what I'm doing. Be prepared however, it's not cheap. In order to serve enough you're going to have to budget at least the same as a structured meal because appetizers usually take more work to prepare so are actually more expensive. we're also having a carving station so guests have an entree option, not just the heavy apps.

UO: you can have just hors d'oeuvres. However, here's the caveat: you must provide lots and different varieties. Have stations. Mashed potato stations, nacho stations, roast beef, oysters, sushi, samosas, satays, etc. As well, you will need crudités.

@FutureMrs, the reception will probably start around 5; we don't have a timeline yet because we don't have a venue yet. I also had a feeling serving enough appetizers will be more expensive, though FH is convinced it wouldn't be.

Heavy appetizers and stations CAN make up a full meal. There just has to be enough quantity and variety. This is a style choice. You do not have to have a traditional, sit-down, plated meal. I have been to a cocktail style reception at 7pm where there was MORE than enough food for a meal and it was amazing. This is definitely not a cheaper option though. It has to be done right.

Especially if I were traveling from OOT, I would expect an actual meal, not heavy apps. This is just my opinion, so take it as you will. As much as I love to munch on apps, I am already spending a ton of money to be there with travel and other accommodations, please serve me an actual sit-down dinner with copious amounts of wine. I also would think that the amount of food you would need heavy apps style would be just as expensive as a plated meal, depending on your area.

How do you know it starts at 5 when you have no venue. You need to work on a venue first and food second.

But if it is truly at 5, you need to serve a meal. I don't want to walk around with a plate for 3 hours snacking until I'm full. And they are definitely more expensive than a plated meal. Our cocktail hour is more expensive than our plated meal portion, and this is just for a normal amount, not "excess"

All FH is seeing is "OMG apps are only $5-$8 a person vs. meals being $50!"

How do I convince him that this is a BAD idea?

Edit: this question is based on one venue we're looking at, and food is a factor in deciding on a venue.

Full meal

Do the math. I researched before making my decision. I think the sites said 6-8 pieces per person per hour in lieu of meal. So at a minimum that's $30 per person per hour for say 3 hours is $90/person. Instead of $50/plate. Honestly the only reason I went this route vs standard buffet was I am serving late and several of my guests told me they would be eating before hand, so it was the best way to accommodate them and also the guests who will want a full meal.

@Callie Sue-tell your FH that you need 10-12 apps per person at $8 each, that's $96 per person. Give him that amount.

You can feed people an entire meal cocktail style, but you need stations too, and it is rarely cheaper than a simple sit down meal.

He's looking at the cost for hors d'oeuvres that preceed a meal; not hors d'oeuvres that replace it

The average "cocktail hour" here (i'm outside of NYC) has four to five 'action stations', a cold station and passed bites. It could certainly be a meal and I hear ALL THE TIME, "how are we going to eat dinner after all of this?"

Personally, I love the format and it's lots of fun, but not if you don't have enough food.