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Jasmin
Beginner June 2019

Honeymoon Fund with Invite?

Jasmin, on January 10, 2019 at 6:54 PM Posted in Honeymoon 0 20
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My fiancé and I are getting married in June. Since we have lived together for 2 years, we have all we need and do not want to set up a traditional registry. We set up a honeymoon fund on the Knot. We have the link on our webste. However, we have some older people that are coming to the wedding that might not see/go on the website. We were thinking of including a little card with our invitations with a poem about contributing to the honeymoon fund.
Is this a good idea? Does anyone have any thoughts?

This is the poem I found on Pinterest that I liked:
“We’ve been together for quite a while
with all our pots and pans.
And as we don’t need homely gifts
we have another plan!
We know it’s not traditional
And not the way it’s done
But rather than a wedding list,
we’d like a bit of sun!
So if you would like to give a gift
and send us on our way,
A donation to our honeymoon
would really make our day!”

20 Comments

Latest activity by JustKidding, on January 11, 2019 at 8:59 AM
  • Cristy
    Master May 2021
    Cristy ·
    • Flag

    Cute poem!!

  • Jasmin
    Beginner June 2019
    Jasmin ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thank you! 😊 Do you think it’s tacky if I send that with the invitation? I figured that at least our guests would know we would rather have contributions to the honeymoon than a traditional registry.
  • Chandra
    Master May 2019
    Chandra ·
    • Flag
    I'm gonna warn you that you might jumped all over for that by everybody on here.
  • Kelly
    Champion October 2018
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    Definitely not. Registry information of any kind is never sent with invitations. Only shower invites, wedding website, or word of mouth.
  • earias
    Champion December 2017
    earias ·
    • Flag

    Registry info and/or any mention of gifts never gets sent with wedding invitations. Also, many people find these poems to be tacky and/or offensive. I personally don't care for them. Everyone knows cash is the best gift. Either don't register or have a small registry and people will get the hint.

  • Cristy
    Master May 2021
    Cristy ·
    • Flag

    I don't think it's tacky, but from what I've read in these forums, I'm in the minority. I'm not sure why people think it's offensive. When I get a wedding invitation, I'm always looking for registry information. If that was there instead, I'd be so relieved to have the decision made.

  • Jasmin
    Beginner June 2019
    Jasmin ·
    • Flag
    That’s why I posted my question on here. I wasn’t sure because I’m not directly saying “Give us money!!” like right on the invitation. It was a little card that would be included. I mean, if I got this with a wedding invitation, I would be happy to know I can just contribute to their fund. Sorry that I’ve never planned a wedding before! 🤷🏽‍♀️ Thank you for your thoughts though ladies! 😊
  • Kelly
    Champion October 2018
    Kelly ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    I’ve never seen a wedding invite that includes registry information. I thought it was standard etiquette that people knew but seeing posts on here I’m finding it might be more regional/social circle. I would be turned off if I received that poem in an invitation but everyone’s guests are different. It just depends how important etiquette and potentially offending people is to you.
  • Future Mrs. R
    Dedicated June 2019
    Future Mrs. R ·
    • Flag
    I am in the minority too. I say do it if you want to. Only you know if your guests will be ok with it. If most of your guests are super old school then you may get some negative deeedback though.

    The poem is sure. I agree with Cristy, I would rather have someone tell me what they want (even in the invite).

    I know I may get some unhappy or or not so nice comment/feedback but here goes... I find it somewhat hypocritical that throughout these forums so many people always say, "Do what you want, its your wedding" when it comes to your family, friends, in-laws, etc. telling how and what to do for your wedding but when it comes to these types of things they are so quick to point out what you should do or not do.

    I get it. Somethings are traditional. However, somethings will change. I think honeymoon funds is one those things that are more and more widely accepted (specifically by younger people).

    Good luck and congrats on your marriage.
  • Jasmin
    Beginner June 2019
    Jasmin ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I really appreciated this feedback! I just didn’t understand why it was so taboo to include even a small thing with the invitation (not on the invitation) you know? I had a friend of mine include something similar in her invitation, and her guests (myself included) were happy to contribute to the fund instead of searching endlessly for a registry. Thank you so much for your advice! 😊
  • B11
    Super May 2019
    B11 ·
    • Flag
    Oh please no poem! I would cringe if I saw that in an invitation.
  • Jessica
    Expert March 2019
    Jessica ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    So much this!! Who cares what anyone else thinks!! Do what YOU WANT TO DO AND DONT LISTEN TO ANYONE ELSE
  • Eamsee
    Super June 2019
    Eamsee ·
    • Flag

    I wouldn't include the poem or anything related to gifts with your invitations. Personally speaking, I think it is rude to ask for gifts or money in any form. Regarding guests who may not go on your website, then most likely they will ask if you are registered anywhere or they will gift you a check or cash.

  • GoingGarcia2019
    Dedicated May 2019
    GoingGarcia2019 ·
    • Flag
    I would be turned off by the inclusion of this with the invitation from the perspective that it gives the impression you expect gifts/money. People will either ask you or family members about your registry, or they’ll just gift money, which is essentially the same as your honeymoon fund.
  • LB
    Champion November 2016
    LB ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    If you dont care what your guests think, why invite guests?
  • Yoice
    VIP March 2019
    Yoice ·
    • Flag
    What’s considered traditional is not as traditional anymore. We are milenians and we have created our own traditions and changing the game around. I say do what suits you best since is your wedding.
  • Joann
    Devoted June 2019
    Joann ·
    • Flag
    I love the idea
  • Ashley
    Just Said Yes April 2019
    Ashley ·
    • Flag
    Really cute poem. Maybe give to your moh for shower invites. With that said If I were invited I’d rather get the bride and groom something they want rather than a cheese grater they have 8 of. My fiancé and I are in the same boat. We blended two house with his two kids so we really don’t need much but I did make a small registry to give my moh piece of mind. Most of our guest already know we live together and don’t need lots and pans. Good luck!!
  • ThatGirl
    Super January 2019
    ThatGirl ·
    • Flag

    I would not include this with your invite. Whether you register for towels or have a honeyfund (which there's all kinds of other controversy around that we don't need to get into here!) it's not ok to include registry info with the invitations. It might be cute because it rhymes and such but it's still the equivalent of asking for a gift / money.

    Talk to your MOH, parents, siblings, etc.. whoever is close to the planning, and ask them to share the info with people who ask. Even here I wouldn't recommend you asking them to spread the word unsolicited, but it's fine to ask them to tell people who ask that you would prefer a check/cash. People may even call you and ask about your registry or lack thereof, and then it's ok to say something like: how sweet of you to ask, we've been together a while and don't need much, but we are saving for a honeymoon. People will get the idea.

  • JustKidding
    VIP April 2018
    JustKidding ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    All of this. You said it much nicer then I would. Smiley tongue

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