Honeyfund

Heads up honey funds are frowned upon on here. You would be better off to either just have a very small registry or no registry and people will get the hint and gift cash.

Been giving cash for weddings for decades without the need to pay a third party online vendor a cut. IMO they are completely unnecessary.

Honeyfunds are not very smart to use. The company won't book or send you certificates for any of those things. All they do is take money out of your gift by way of a fee for putting the money in your bank for you. So not only are your friends and family believing that they are gifting you something you will never receive but then you don't even get the full amount they want to gift you! The middleman (IE the honeyfund site) is completely unnecessary.

If you are looking for cash, you are better off having a very small registry or forgoing the registry altogether. People will get the hint and bring cash/checks in a card to your wedding. That way you get the full amount and the guests are 100% aware that you are actually receiving the gift they choose to give you.

I would do a forum search for this one. Small registry or nothing at all. Your guests are adults who will get the hint that all you and your FS want is money. No need for a cute poem or a website that charges you for using their service.

Admins - Can you add "honeyfund" to the list of swear words?

They turn out to just be a cutesy way for your guests to pay a charge to give you cash. They do no travel planning at all. People buy you a "dinner out" or "couples massage" but it's just the cash value that you get and the company charges your guest for giving it.
If they worked at all as a travel agent I would have no issue with it, but it just seems scammy. I know some people have families that don't give cash, but I feel like there are other options. Get a really basic cabin on a cruise and you can open that up for people to get you travel extras that are what they say they are and at no additional cost.

View Quoted Comment Thank you!!! Just something I had seen on articles about low budget weddings. Didn’t realize they were taboo lol

There are many users who are strongly against and some who are strongly for. This is a read your crowd type of thing. Personally I don’t have anything against them. For me times are changing and some people would prefer to gift an experience. Yes the site doesn’t book t for you but I’ve seen couples take pictures of whatever experience was gifted and include it in their thank you. I personally see the small fee the same as me having to pay shipping or gas to get to an atm since I don’t carry cash. However, if your social circle is different than mine it could be frowned upon.

View Quoted Comment I'm so sorry! It was such an innocent question and things get a little crazy when the topic comes up.

I know they're highly frowned upon here. Personally, if I were going to ask for cash (which I do view as super tacky and rude) I'd be up front and say it's going towards a new house.

But I'm just planning on putting away whatever money we DO get and that'll be going towards our down payment once we find a house we love.

But I don't feel the need to announce what it's for, which is what a honeyfund essentially does.

I have not developed a registry, but I've known several couples that have used honeyfund and other honeymoon registry sites. They are very convenient for guests and for couples. The couple links the fund through a secure site to an account at their banking institution, much the same way you would with Venmo or PayPal, and money is deposited directly into the account. On the guest end, the options are segmented so the gifts present in much the same way as crowd funding platforms. Guests are able to view the activities or expense of airline tickets, hotel stay, or food and contribute in incremental amounts. Generally, the transfer fee is absorbed by the gifter so that the recipient may receive the entire gift, like with eventbrite or Ticketmaster purchases. I, personally, think it is a fantastic option for gifting because you know exactly how to best honor the couple, especially if they have little need or desire for material objects. Not everyone agrees that it is appropriate, and some people even think it is vulgar to request funded experiences as gifts. I encourage you to trust that the people who love and support your marriage will be steadfast no matter the type of registry you choose.

As a guest, I would prefer to just give cash on my own. I wasn't 100% sure but figured the third party would take a cut out of it. If I'm giving $100, I want the happy couple to get all of that. I might be in the minority but I actually prefer to give cash for a wedding so the happy couple can choose what they want to do with it.

As a bride, I like the concept/idea of having a honeyfund. FH and I already live together and have the majority of things we would need. For our registry, we're planning on doing a few items we want upgraded along with a few smaller items that we wouldn't necessarily buy for ourselves. By having a smaller registry, people should know to either get you something on the list or just gift cash. As a PP said, any cash we receive will be going to a down payment for a house. Although most of our guests know this through small talk, I'm planning on making a note of it in our thank you notes rather than posting it on our website or invitation.

I don’t have any ethical issue with them as others do. The idea that putting a blender on your registry is acceptable but an excursion on your honeymoon isn’t makes no sense to me. I also think that the idea of making a small registry so people get the hint sounds passive aggressive to. Also people here mention the fee but it’s no difference then paying sales tax on a gift (the couple doesn’t get the sales tax, or paying a fee for a Visa or Amex gift card. There was a time when registries themselves were taboo and now they’re not. Times have changed and many couples either come to the relationship with stuff if they’ve lived alone before marriage or have built a household with their fiancée. Also, having a honey fund or any kind of registry doesn’t mean guests have to purchase from them. It’s a suggestion, not an order.

When they first came out and someone had one on their registry, I was super amped I could gift them like a HELICOPTER RIDE. I chose that (or a donation toward it) and thought it was so neat.
Soooo....come to find out, there is no helicopter ride. The money I put in just goes to the couple to do with as they please. I’m not offended by this concept. BUT, I was super disappointed that it turns out....there was no helicopter ride. They took their cash and chose other excursions. Not a big deal but I thought I was contributing to something way cooler than I was. Instead I contributed to the idea of the thing not the actual thing. Not a big deal but a little bummer since I didn’t know that til way after the fact.

The other compelling argument against them is the fees. Even with “no fee” funds, there’s still a credit card processing fee. You as the couple can chose to eat that fee, BUT you’re kind of screwing your self over. Someone’s decided they’re gonna gift you $100. They were gonna do cash but decided to ‘invest’ in your honeyfund instead. Then instead of getting $100, if you’re covering the fees, you’re not getting more than $97. Not a huge deal, but, when you’re talking a hundred guests, the loss adds up

Love the honeyfund. We use Zola and they take 2.5% for a few (they have to make money to offer this service). That's going to be $2.50 on a $100 gift. Not a huge deal. My guests love it. They want to give us something more personal than cash, but we've been living together for 3 years and don't need a lot of stuff. Plus people like giving us experiences. The way it works, is you can set up so that they actually buy the tickets to the activity or whatever for no few or you set up a cash fund. With the cash fund, the money goes straight to you. Then as a decent human, you use that money for what it was given to you for and then write a thank you to the person talking about the activity they gifted you for your honeymoon.
This is taboo to some because it's new and not traditional. My guests think it's awesome from my grandmom who is in her 70s to our college buds in their 20s. People want to give us what we want and money towards our honeymoon to do things we wouldn't normally do is what we want. If anyone doesn't like it, they can get us something from our small traditional registry, cash, or nothing and that's fine.

View Quoted Comment That sounds like a super depressing way to learn how honeyfunds work. Thanks for letting us learn from that. A helicopter ride sounds like it would have been an absolutely fabulous gift.

View Quoted Comment That $2.50 adds up though. 40 people give $100 through the fund, and it costs you $100. That's an entire gift! Just don't register and people will give you monetary gifts in a card. You also get those gifts immediately rather than at a later date. I just don't understand why so many people are willing to throw money away. It just doesn't make sense.

View Quoted Comment Regardless of the honeyfund I don’t think a small registry is the way to go. I worked at BBB for five years and half that time I was a bridal consultant so I helped a lot of customers shopping off of registries. They don’t “get the hint” when the registry is small. They get angry that there isn’t enough gifts.

View Quoted Comment Exactly... why do brides and grooms want to not receive the full amount that their guests intended for them to have?!? DUH! That drives me crazy that they can’t get that concept through their heads!!!

View Quoted Comment Yes yes YES!!! Preach!!!
The guests think it’s great because they’re not the ones seeing the fees being taken out of their gift!!!
This drives me bat guano CRAZY!

I have made a small registry, but on my wedding website (and only there!) I have contact info for our travel agent. If people really and truly want to contribute towards my honeymoon, they can call or email her and buy a gift certificate.

FH and I are putting the honeymoon on a credit card, and plan to use the money we get at the wedding to pay off the credit card.