Help! What do you do when people invite themselves to your wedding and reception?

"I'm sorry, we're keeping the wedding to immediate family and friends only. We'd love to celebrate over dinner/drinks/bowling/whatever with you sometime after!"

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Thank you Caytlyn!

I can't believe that there's still people out there that think it's ok to invite themselves to any kind if event, let alone a wedding. I'd say exactly what Caytlyn said. Politely just let them know that you're keeping it to closest friends and family.

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Thanks Abby,

It is hard to understand. I'm considering it a compliment that they want to come. I just know its not possible though...

Thanks for responding!

Agree with Caytlyn, that's probably the best way to address it. I might also throw in that it's a small gathering of family and friends, to make sure they understand that not many are attending, and it's an intimate affair. Some people don't take hints easily (obviously).

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Thanks Theresa! I think the words "small gathering" would help them not feel badly.

Just be honest with them and inform them that you’re budget can’t fit everyone that you would have liked.

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Thanks Tara.

I would hope that not getting an invitation would be the only sort of sign they needed. 🤦‍♀️

Sadly some people just do not get there was a reason you did not get a wedding invitation.

You and I are having a similar wedding with everything being held at one venue. We are also limiting the number if guest. One thing we agreed on together is if we don't have contact with you on a regular basis then then you won't be invited. This cut the list significantly

I respectfully declind them and tell them that i dont have any available spots left and cant accommodate them . hopefully they will understand im having this same problem now but i also did what i just told you and they understood.

I would say
"We are having small/intimate family only wedding, but we would love to celebrate over dinner with you"
My mother in law wanted to invite her friends and I reminded her my own friends weren't even coming. She got the hint, I think anyone else will too.

For me, honesty is the best policy. You can never guarentee they wont be hurt but for instance I have a family friend who thinks tlwe are bffffff's and I can barely stand her. She invited herself and her (at the time) friend (now bf) and I said absoltely no with the friend because its enough just to invite yourself. I had though of inviting her to not hurt her feelings but I have now decided once she brings it up again that I'm going to tell her that I'm keeping it small and don't know who's invited but it's probubly just going to be family and a few close friends

View Quoted Comment Weddings can be a sensitive time for sure.

View Quoted Comment Thanks for sharing.

What are they saying when they invite themselves?