Help!! My future husband is in his feelings

You did nothing wrong. If you want your wedding dress to remain a surprise, then you don't have to tell him about it. If you are paying for it on your own and not using any of his money, then I don't think it requires him knowing about it.

You're paying for the dress with your own money so you didn't do anything wrong. My fiance doesn't know anything about the dress including the cost. I would tell him if he asked, but it's not come up because he's not paying for it. But, I do think you should discuss your expectations regarding what you'll share about your personal finances after marriage. Will you combine into one account? Will you consult the other before a major purchase? What constitutes a major purchase? Is it $100 or $1000? That's probably where the issue is. It's nobody's fault, just a misunderstanding about what needs to be shared.

View Quoted Comment You know it's been so crazy these last couple of months and I thank you for mentioning that to me

View Quoted Comment Thank you Meghan
I am so over it like I told him you will not see my dress until the wedding

You have to remember that it’s not an ( I, you or me ) anymore It’s now US OUR AND WE. This could be an issue going forward nip that right now Sis! As she previously said Couples argue over finances. Communication is EVERYTHING even if you don’t show him the dress just talk about what you’re going to spend.

With my hubby, even when my FI, the issue would be that he felt shut out that I did not share something so important to me, not my choice, or timing, or the actual money. I am never sure if it is more just his being an engineer by temperament, liking all parts or everything laid out so he sees the whole picture. Or, a good part because in his younger years, in a family with too many children for income, everything had to be meticulously planned out and discussed to made sure every need was met, with father running a business that was variable for money in its early years. He is not controlling, and actually likes it better if I take care of routine medical and bill type stuff. He has never said no to anything I think important, or been afraid to spend money. Just needs to know, it is being spent, and it is fine with our overall budget. Planning a wedding is often the first major project as a couple. Teaches you a lot about

Each other. Some traits they may usually only show at work, as well as money.
( Sorry, for cut off reply. Puppy helps post )

I think the dress should be a surprise but the finacies should be discussed

If you paid for it with your own money, I don’t see the issue in wanting it to be a surprise. Unless he just wanted to be notified that you’re paying towards your dress already... either way, I’m still not seeing the issue

My fiance knew I was going to buy my dress, but not because he demanded it. It was something that I was scheduling that had to do with our wedding so I just mentioned it. I honestly can't remember if I told him how much it cost- it's really not his concern in my eyes, because my mom paid a portion and then I paid the remainder (it was above the budget she allotted me). If I did, okay- and if I didn't, also okay. He has no idea what it looks like, nor will he until our wedding day. I have my good friend holding it.

I don't, personally, think you did anything wrong. At least not so wrong that an argument should have ensued.

View Quoted Comment I know and I just over the hold thing but thanks