Planning our wedding has been an absolute breeze, that is, until my MIL wanted to add 10+ additional guests to the list after we already sent out invites. Any advice on how to let her know (gently) that this is just not going to happen?
To give you a point of reference:We have invited 220 people and are comfortable with that number. We would have preferred less but since my parents are helping exponentially with wedding costs, we knew we had to allow for more guests in goodwill to them since it is by their contribution that we are even able to afford the wedding without needing more time to save.
While it isn't the basis for this whole discussion, I think it is important to note that my fiance's family hasn't offered to contribute to the wedding financially in any way. They did throw us a nice engagement party, but we don't feel like it is proper etiquette to ask that they help out with wedding expenses if they haven't offered, so we've just accepted that they aren't going to help. This means, in my mind, that we can be more firm on guest list limitations. My fiance is in agreement with me on this and feels like it would be different if his parents were contributing. Even so, I want to be as fair as possible, so we haven't limited their guest list additions by a lot, we have actually given my fiance's side a large number of invites, almost equal if not totally equal to the amount of additions to the list my family made.
Our venue can accommodate 240 MAX, however, that would mean having to put tables on the dance floor which we do not want to do since it would greatly limit our dancing space. 200 is the venue's comfortable maximum number. At 200, no tables would have to be set up on the dance floor. This is the final RSVP we are hoping for.
My MIL just asked me if she can add at least 10 more people to the list, knowing our venue size and that I have already sent out invitations. She wants to invite the neighbor that babysat my fiance back in the day, people from her bible study group, and a bunch more that my fiance doesn't even know.
Bottom line is we cant, not only for budgetary reasons but there just isn't the space to allow for it! This limitation on guest additions goes for everyone, we aren't singling out my fiance's side. There are friends we couldn't invite as we had to consider who was closest to us and who we absolutely wanted to invite. She keeps asking me if anyone has RSVP'd as declined so that she can tell me who to add, while I'm kind of hoping at least 20 decline so that we can get closer to the smaller guest count we want!
How do I tell her we can't accept any more guest list additions?