Help. Guests that think they’re invited!

If you don't want to invite them, don't feel obligated! You can't include everyone, and the only people who get to decide the guest list are you and your fiance. If anyone asks why they weren't included, you could reply with something like, "We unfortunately weren't able to include everyone that we wanted to, due to limited venue capacity." Or, "We decided to keep it a small, intimate wedding, so we weren't able to include everyone."

What made them think they are invited? Are weddings in your circle open community events for everyone? If so, they may think yours is as well. Hire security if you need to to prevent crashers, but they may be required anyway. There is no need to say anything because it reflects badly on them if they show up uninvited and don’t have a seat. In which case, another reason to have assigned seating.



Never ever invite anyone out of obligation to please others that you do not want in attendance. If these people don’t make your main list of invites because you can’t imagine the day without them, they do not receive an invitation under any circumstance. You can meet up for coffee at another time or have a family reunion picnic at the local park at another time that everyone contributes to so it is not your responsibility to host.

I told one of my close coworkers that I got engaged and she was very excited for me. She asked if we picked a date and I said yes. She said oh great, let me get my calendar! That put me in an awkward spot because I wasn’t inviting any coworkers 🤣 I had to awkwardly explain that it was only close family. It was def awk!!!