I need prayers and pixie dust. My wedding is in 8 days. I’m breaking. I should be happy and excited but my heart is so heavy. I had a long sob post typed up but deleted it bc it was extremely long and detailed. Basically my family hates my fiancé and hasn’t even given him a chance. In two years my dads refused to even speak to him. My ex husband (abuser of 6 years mental and physical) has started a bunch of crap and taken my kids away that we’re supposed to be in my wedding and until we go back to court I can’t see them or speak to them. My family is on his side. Everything I do is a disappointment. My fiancé is the only support I have. He has been by my side through everything and he is the best thing (other than my kids) to ever happen to me. I have done so much to get myself in a better place and move on with my life and everything I do isn’t good enough. My son was supposed to walk me down the aisle. And my parents declined coming to the wedding. Not that I’m surprised but a part of me hoped they’d show bc I miss having a family. My future in laws are wonderful and treat me so well but i still wanted the family I grew up loving to be there. And the declined rsvp just kinda kicked me when I was already down. I’m on the verge of tears. I’m so scared that next Thursday when I wake up I’ll be in tears. I’m dreading my wedding. Im afraid I’ll be wearing a fake smile in my 1600 dollar photos. I’m not gonna be the princess I always hoped to be. I’m just too broken. 😔 I can’t cancel. I’ve spent thousands and guests have made arrangements. And I don’t want to. I want to be married to this man. I want him to be my husband. But I’m just not ok. Please send pixie dust and prayers. Because I am hurting. I am breaking and depressed. The past year I have been so excited and now that it’s here I just want to lay down and cry.
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