Head table

@Grace, I like that idea. I will run it past FH.

It seems to be very, very unpopular on here whenever people mention a head table or separating guests. However, in weddings I've actually been to, my FH has been a groomsman in many and I would feel very odd up at the head table, not being in the wedding, especially bc they typically have bridal party things to do, speeches, pics to take, so I'd rather be on my own (at the bar) for the short time instead of awkwardly being in the way. It's seriously not a big deal in our group

@MrsVoegs, you said "FH also is with the unpopular opinion that we don't need dates up there, and I kind of agree...." So if you know its rude to separate couples, why are you still considering it?

Honestly, I think you should tell your FH to suck it up and do a sweetheart table. If you are concerned about the added seats or logistics of wedding party members bringing their children, I think a sweetheart table is your best bet.

Yeah it's not a big deal in our group either. People expect the head table to be BP only. I badly wanted to do a king's table, but FH wouldn't budge.... so I decided it wasn't going to be the hill I died on and just got over it.

ETA: I was actually surprised because he is so introverted that I thought he would understand the reasoning behind it.

I know what I said, and agreeing with/thinking something is different than doing. Again, like I said in my original post..looking for ways to accommodate everyone. I understand the so-called wedding "etiquette", FH doesn't always. Does that mean I agree with said etiquette and think it's right or logical? No.

So, with that being said.. to include everyone's dates and children, looks like my only option is a king's table or "telling FH to suck it up" and have a sweetheart table.

Sorry MrsVoegs. You seem offended by what I said. I just don't understand how someone could be so against a sweetheart table. You are only sitting there for dinner, and no matter where you sit, the attention is on the bride and groom. Even if you have not been uncomfortable as a guest sitting without your SO, that doesn't mean that everyone feels the same way.

I would put you and FH and maybe your MOH and BM with their SO's on a platform behind a table floor level with the rest of your WP and SO's. So basically a two tiered head table.

Something like this

Meh, not really offended, just didn't care for the choice of words. My FH has extreme social anxiety issues and having a head table instead of a sweetheart table, for whatever reason, and having a receiving line rather than doing table visits, are the two things he's been adamant and extremely opinionated about. So because of that, so I'm trying to take that into consideration.

I'm going to continue with my plans to include the date/SO's/children, but I am also going to discuss it with everyone to make sure they are comfortable with it, because I had not considered including their children (duh me). Like @FutureMrsAllen said, the BM's girlfriend may feel uncomfortable sitting at the head table with their one year old. What if she gets fussy or starts crying up there in front of everyone? I know I'd be embarrassed. Same with the wife that will be up there with their two young children. Just something to consider, just as you said, not everyone feels the same way.

I don't think the risers are necessary at all. I would save the money for something else.

I have never been to a wedding nor have I ever been in a wedding where significant others were at the head table. Only the actual wedding party. That's how we're doing it for our head table.

I have never attended a wedding that did not have a head table with just the bridal party seated at it. I find nothing wrong with a head table.

I would do a king's table

Platform to watch your bridal party do what? Eat? We are def doing a sweetheart table because unless its eating no one will be sitting down anyway.

I'm team "no platform." Why would you even want a platform anyway? What purpose does it serve? What is appealing about literally putting yourself above your guests?

Kings table instead?

Our venue offers the risers as well. It's not unheard of but I would like to skip it. FH is set on a head table so we will be doing a typical one for our area (WP only).

Skip the risers.