Vanessa
Just Said Yes December 2021

Has anyone not had bridesmaids?

Vanessa, on December 28, 2020 at 12:43 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 1 20
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Hello! I just got engaged and I’m so excited but the thought of choosing bridesmaids is really stressing me out. I have about 7 girls who I have been or have been told I will be a bridesmaid in their wedding. My fiancé and I want to keep the wedding as small as possible and go to Hawaii with mostly family. Probably 20-30 guests with just my sister as my MOH. The problem is I don’t want to upset anyone and I still want to include them somehow. Does anyone have any advice? Thank you!

20 Comments

Latest activity by Kirstyn, on January 9, 2021 at 2:57 PM
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    I opted out of bridesmaids. There's no way I could choose between my friends.
    • Reply
  • Meghan
    Expert September 2021
    Meghan ·
    • Flag
    I only had my sisters & two cousins as my bridesmaids since I couldn’t pick a few friends. I’m going to invite friends to the bachelorette party though!
    • Reply
  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag
    If you just want to have your sister as your MOH I think that's totally fine. Bridesmaids aren't necessary especially for a destination wedding. Your friends might be just as glad because it could be very expensive for them to not only travel for the wedding, but to also pay the costs associated with being a bridesmaid.
    • Reply
  • Erin
    Expert May 2021
    Erin ·
    • Flag

    I don't plan on having a bridal party .. especially based of off people comments on here they are just too much money and too much drama... that's not me. so not having a bridal party at all for my wedding.

    • Reply
  • Alyssa
    Dedicated July 2021
    Alyssa ·
    • Flag
    I’m also not having a bridal party! & We are also having a destination wedding! I love my friends, but it would be too stressful and expensive for everyone to have to purchase dresses/accessories/hair & makeup. And I’d just rather have pictures of my husband and I. I also didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings —I had a few friends that expected to be bridesmaids when I wasn’t going to ask them :/
    • Reply
  • Lisa
    Super October 2021
    Lisa ·
    • Flag
    We are having (hopefully) a 100 person guest list. I’m not having bridesmaids, just my sister as my Matron of Honor. I considered two girls to be bridesmaids but at the end of the day we aren’t very close and I don’t have many friends to choose from. I didn’t want to just pick people to pick them. My fiancé on the other hand has tons of close friends and could have had 8-9 groomsmen but opted for only a best man. He didn’t want to have to choose between the others and we wanted even sides.
    • Reply
  • Adela
    Savvy December 2021
    Adela ·
    • Flag
    I would just tell them you are only going to have your sister since it is a small wedding and you didn’t want them to have to worry about traveling expenses and bridesmaid expenses. I’m actually not having a bridesmaid or a best man.
    • Reply
  • J
    Savvy April 2021
    Jaquelyn ·
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    It’s your wedding. You can do whatever you want. Not having bridesmaids is a personal choice and very common these days. I would just have a conversation with all your close friends and let them know what your thinking. There are other ways to include your best girlfriends without them being an attendant. They can help you get dressed, serve as a hostess, or help with all your pre wedding details. You will need help so it’ll be great to have them.
    • Reply
  • J
    Just Said Yes May 2022
    Jessica ·
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    Don't think bc someone offered you to be in their wedding, you have to put them in yours. It's not how it goes. There are no rules except the rules that you make. This is YOUR wedding and you can't take everyone's feelings into consideration because this is a one time thing. I have 8 bridesmaids picked out lol, and I can't pick between the 8. That's literally the only friends I have so 🤷‍♀️
    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    We had 15 guests and we opted out of having a wedding party. But I did get ready with my mom & sister so still enjoyed “girl time” and some special photos together. Would that work?
    • Reply
  • Maureen
    Devoted November 2021
    Maureen ·
    • Flag
    I only have my sister as my MOH, and my friends support it. I have two many important women in my life (friends, cousins, SILs) that I don’t want a parade of women at the alter. The intimacy of just us and two witnesses, a MOH and BM, is what we want. I think it’s very authentic. The girlfriends will support me the morning of, and have the option to see me in the dress before the aisle, and take nice professional pictures with them.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    Being just a guest is a huge honor. Many people do not want responsibility of being a bridesmaid and it gets expensive for both them and the bride. For 20 guests, you are fine with just one MoH. If someone gets upset, that's their issue, not yours.
    • Reply
  • Victorian Bride
    Master February 2022
    Victorian Bride ·
    • Flag
    Since we have had to postpone so many times, we are now eloping. No wedding party whatsoever. If you tell them you'd love to have included them, but due to the pandemic and wedding costs, your wedding will now be immediate family only. Suggest that you all get together for brunch afterwards to celebrate!! If they are true friends, they will understand. Best wishes & Congratulations!! xx
    • Reply
  • Nicole
    Devoted August 2022
    Nicole ·
    • Flag
    We're not doing a wedding party. We didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, it keeps things simpler (no matching outfits, bouquets, etc), and our guests don't have to do any work other than show up and enjoy.
    • Reply
  • S
    Dedicated September 2020
    S Kab ·
    • Flag

    I didn't have a bridal party. My sister held my bouquet during the ceremony but didn't have the formal MOH title. DH brother stood by his side with the rings. Due to Covid we had a small ceremony anyway so it was easy to explain why the lack of a bridal party and we also didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings. With less than 6 months to plan everything, not having a bridal party also made things much easier and less stressful.

    • Reply
  • Kayse
    Expert December 2020
    Kayse ·
    • Flag

    We didn't have a wedding party either.

    • Reply
  • Maureen
    Devoted November 2021
    Maureen ·
    • Flag
    I’m not having any except my sister as my MOH, and and if I did, I was trying to chose between 7 girls. It got to be too much!! I’m inviting them to be with me the morning of and pop some champagne, and they will see my wedding dress reveal if they choose too. I also would like to get some nice portraits with them. Smiley smile
    • Reply
  • Nymphea
    Just Said Yes August 2021
    Nymphea ·
    • Flag

    Not doing bridesmaids or groomsmen. Although it would be nice, most of my friends live far away and we don't have a ton of them either. I'm glad me and my FH are on the same page about this.

    I'm sure your friends would be understanding. It'd be less expensive for everyone.

    • Reply
  • Florida Marlins
    Expert October 2017
    Florida Marlins ·
    • Flag

    Me!! It was my second wedding and my two college age sons stood with me. Too many great friends to pick from plus they are the best men I know!!!

    • Reply
  • K
    Just Said Yes June 2022
    Kirstyn ·
    • Flag

    Hi!! My fiancé and I did not want a large bridal party but we both extremely close to our siblings (I have 2 sisters and a brother and he has 3 sisters). So, we opted out of a traditional bridal party and instead our respective siblings will stand by our sides! I do have a really good friend from work that I was thinking of having as a bridesmaid, but instead I just invited her to be a part of the wedding (i.e, candle lighter, reader, etc) but also invited her to get ready with the of the pseudo-bridal party the day of. She was completely understanding and was so excited to be a part of the big day!

    • Reply

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