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Just Said Yes October 2020

Has anyone had a post-covid wedding or planning one this year?

Sherrenique, on August 24, 2020 at 1:51 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 18

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Hey y’all 👋🏽
We got engaged last December & set a date of 10/17/2020 to wed. Of course Covid happened & all planning stopped. Once things started opening, I went back and forth in my mind about what to do. I literally threw up one night, my anxiety was so bad. So I just decided to not do it. But honestly, that just didn’t sit well with me. So we decided to forge through. Our guest count dropped from nearly 300 to 80 (1/2 of our new venue’s capacity). We’re taking temps at the door, requiring masks, and seating guests by households. Still, I keep finding random articles of people contesting the virus at weddings (though rare) & I feel guilty about going through with it. I do believe in this climate, we need to not only focus on physical health, but mental & emotional as well. And that’s part of why I chose to have the wedding- to give us something to look forward to. But honestly, I can’t get the thoughts out of my mind of what IF someone were to catch Covid. That would just destroy me. ONLY those who have had a Covid-friendly wedding in the past few months or those who are planning one. What did/are you doing to give yourself peace of mind?

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18 Comments

Latest activity by Taylor, on September 1, 2020 at 5:04 PM

October 2020
Angelica · on August 24, 2020 at 2:15 AM
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We’re going through with our wedding on 10/10/200 with about 95 people invited, but hoping for 80ish or less- a backyard wedding.

To me, 95 sounds like a lot during these COVID times, but then I look around at all the restaurants open with complete strangers near each other and find myself saying if strangers can do it than surely family should be fine.
I know many of our family members want to be at our wedding and I didn’t think it was fair to take that opportunity away from them. If they are comfortable coming the will and if they are not they won’t- and we’ve made it clear that is 100% okay.
At the end of the day, it seems very difficult to tell when someone gets infected with COVID. People could be at the wedding one day and out somewhere the next and then get COVID. Plus, if your family is like ours it didn’t make sense to downsize anymore because the people who were being cut were the ones who frequently visit or live with those still invited.
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Devoted September 2020
Marabeth · on August 24, 2020 at 3:18 AM
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We are going through with our 11/07 wedding.

We’ve cut our list down to about 40 people. We aren’t expecting all to show up. Our venue said they can space out the tables, we will only sit households and those already exposed to each other together. Our venue is outside for both the ceremony and reception. We plan to have hand sanitizer and mask as favors, sanitation stations set up through out, and hopefully a food truck so there’s not multiple people coming in contact with the food. We will ask people if they are showing symptoms to please not come. We are sending out an invite to the livestream link for those who cannot make it and those on our original list. I am high risk so we are limiting my outings until the ceremony. Our wedding party and those I’ll be in close contact with will be tested before the ceremony.
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Master October 2021
Sexypoodle · on August 24, 2020 at 7:03 AM
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I’m so sorry to hear how much this is affecting you mentally and physically. We were originally 10/10/20 but in June we decided to postpone to next October. I do hope everything works out for you and I’m sure it will be a great time!
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Master October 2020
Yasmine · on August 24, 2020 at 7:16 AM
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We are having a minimony at the beginning of October with about 30 people. On the invite I made sure to put that if people don't feel comfortable coming then we totally understand. Our original guest count was about 100 so that wedding is scheduled for March 2021. We wanted to do something small on our original date so we are only inviting our family and each of our best friends. I'm not stressing too much over it though, think of the positives!
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Super October 2020
Trisha · on August 24, 2020 at 7:22 AM
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We Are Going Through With Our 10/17 Wedding With Our Original Guest Count Of 60.
Honestly People KNOW The Risks Of Attending Gatherings So You Shouldnt Beat Yourself Up Over It.
If Someone Happens To Get Sick It Wouldnt Be Your Fault. They Will Make Their Own Choices. The Most You Can Do Is Take Precautions And it Looks Like Youre Doing Great With That.
Dont Stress, Enjoy Your Planning And Enjoy Your Big Day When It Comes. Dont Let This Virus Stop You From Living Your Life Happily
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Devoted October 2020
Futuremrsn · on August 24, 2020 at 8:49 AM
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We are going through with our 10/4/20 wedding! We originally invited 120 people but as it’s looking now only a little more than half of that are showing up and that’s perfectly fine with me! Our wedding is now going to be outdoors under a tent (the venue is a barn) and we have alerted guests that they are welcome to wear masks if they want. Now that we have a smaller guest list we can keep people spaced apart better as well. I think you’ll have a perfect wedding!
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Devoted July 2021
Jeni · on August 24, 2020 at 1:00 PM
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We had a minimony this month with only 9 of us there (not counting the officiant, photographer, and venue coordinator). We required masks for guests that I purchased, had hand sanitizer at every seat as favors, sat by household (no more than 2 per table), and ordered individually wrapped meals and appetizers. Even with all of that, I didn't feel complete relief until the last of the group had been home 14 days without any symptoms, which is today!

There's a risk in hosting an event, and you and your guests each need to calculate how much of a risk you're willing to take. These decisions are extremely personal, so I suggest determining your own risk first and decide if you will still host your wedding. If you move forward, be upfront with your guests that you support everyone's decisions whether to attend or not, wear a mask, social distance, or whatever. Then implement whatever you feel is needed to make you and your guests safer, including encouraging everyone to stay home if they aren't feeling well.
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VIP September 2020
Molly · on August 24, 2020 at 1:04 PM
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I will be in 12 days, in CA with 50 guests.
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VIP September 2020
Kelsey · on August 24, 2020 at 1:08 PM
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We are going through with our wedding on 9/12. Most of our guests are super excited to have a break from all the COVID stuff and celebrate. To be honest, I hate the term and being called a COVID bride; to me I'm just a bride who wants to marry the man of her dreams. We had a 52% decline rate, those who want to come can come those who don't want to don't have. We have to make the decision that is best for each of us. I like to say that the 88 people coming are the greatest guests we can have. I try to stay positive every day and not let the downers get to me. 19 more days till I marry my FH and I can't wait!
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Master May 2020
Kari · on August 24, 2020 at 3:47 PM
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We are in New Hampshire, and have family in New Jersey and NYC, which was hit pretty hard early on. We postponed/canceled our May 2020 wedding and did a small mini-ceremony/elopement instead. It was only our parents and some close friends, and we stayed socially distant because of our parents' health concerns (my mom was diagnosed with cancer just 10 days before our wedding date and my FIL has heart disease, and both are in their 70s). Not being able to hug my in-laws, having to wave at friends from a distance, not having our entire wedding parties or my husband's sister there, and giving up a lot of what we planned for was really disappointing. It didn't really feel like a celebration, but I'm glad we went through with getting married despite everything.
Since we could not get a refund from any vendors we postponed our bigger event to June 2021 but I'm not that hopeful about it. Unless we can freely hug and dance we just aren't going to go through with it. We wanted a full wedding experience with drinks, food, and dancing and it's not worth it to spend tons of money on something that is going to be a giant compromise, or to just carry on as if there was no virus when the threat is very real. We wouldn't feel comfortable having an event where we couldn't do everything possible to keep guests safe.
There was recently a wedding in Maine where more than 50 people got infected and at least one death has been linked to that event. No way would I want that guilt or responsibility, and I wouldn't be able to enjoy the night knowing I was putting my loved ones at risk. Unless there is a vaccine, really effective treatments, or a way to rapid test our guests by next year, I just don't see us having the wedding we planned ever.
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Dedicated November 2020
Brittany · on August 24, 2020 at 4:12 PM
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We are going full steam ahead with our 11/15 wedding. Our venue only requires masks indoors and nothing else currently so, our original guest count of 135 stands. We are starting to get RSVP back and all but 1 said yes so far.

Our expectation is that our guests are aware of COVID and they can choose to come based on comfortability with themselves. They can chose to wear their mask as they see fit throughout the night with eating and drinking. But we aren't so concerned with the possibility of COVID. We don't have anyone who we think would get super sick from it, fingers crossed. And I am assuming guests know the possibile consequences.
But, whatever makes you feel comfortable. Don't stress about making everyone comfortable and happy. If they are comfortable coming, they will just take all the precautions needed in my opinion!
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August 2020
JM Sunshine · on August 30, 2020 at 10:50 PM
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My daughter just had her wedding Aug. 1st with 85 guests in No. Cal. She already postponed once (June) and refused to keep putting life on hold. It was a beautiful day and all precautions/Covid protocols were put in place. About 40% of guests traveled from So. Cal and 10% out of state. It's been a month and everyone is healthy.
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Expert November 2021
Sara · on August 30, 2020 at 11:01 PM
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We postponed our November 2020 wedding to November 2021. Totally understandable that this would affect you mentally, especially after the recent events at that Maine wedding in the news being a super-spreading event. I'm not sure what you mean by planning a post-Covid wedding though, because who knows when Covid will be over. Best of luck whatever you decide
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Just Said Yes October 2020
Sherrenique · on August 31, 2020 at 12:09 AM
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Anything after Covid Lol! So anything March 2020 or after.
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Devoted August 2020
Kate · on August 31, 2020 at 1:24 AM
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We got married on 8/14 with 120 people. Our venue had a maximum capacity of 300, plus outdoor space, so if felt very roomy. We took lots of precaution including hand sanitizers on every table, waitstaff serving the buffet style dinner, individual mini cakes, disposable drink ware, only 6 people per table, etc. and it honestly still felt very “normal.” we had a lovely day with absolutely zero regrets. We were ready to move on with our lives too! I couldn’t personally have postponed for a second time and survived mentally and emotionally. It has been 16 days and everyone is healthy. The people who feel comfortable coming will make their own decision to do so, so you shouldn’t feel guilty at all about wanting to proceed! No one knows what the world will be like even a week from now, so you have to make the right decision for yourself, and it sounds like you are doing everything you can to keep your guests safe too. Best of luck to you!
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Expert November 2021
Sara · on August 31, 2020 at 1:26 AM
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Whoops I misinterpreted that
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Beginner October 2020
Janine · on September 1, 2020 at 4:51 PM
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We're having our wedding on 10/10/2020 with only 19 people (including officiant and photographer). Those that are worried about COVID will continue to wear their masks during the outdoor ceremony. Our venue already showed up their plan for social distancing and sanitation. We're even giving personal hand sanitizers as one of the favors.
We are going to live stream the ceremony for those we couldn't invite or those that can't make it because they are high risk.
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