"Guys And Wedding Planning Don't Mix"

I actually sort of agree to this but it depends on the person. Overall grooms don’t have fairytale weddings jammed down their throats since they were children and likewise they deal with the joke to “just show up” so there’s a negative stereotype from both sides happening here from a very young age.
My own groom wanted to be involved in the planning but he became extremely overwhelmed by it. He had no experience to fall back on, no married men to ask advice from because the general advice was “just pay for everything and show up”, so he turned to me and needed to be given specific tasks to focus on. If I said “Find us x vendor” he would be very lost but if I said “Book appointment with vendor I found” he could do that. He also started to relax and have fun with DIY crafts because he wasn’t set loose to google everything. He had X task in front of him.

I think partners naturally want to help each other but the wedding industry discourages it. He’s been told by vendors “Wait what are you doing here?” and it’s really sad.

The article is, in my opinion, insufferable and sexist. It sounds like the author is a wet blanket and wouldn't enjoy a birthday party either.
My fiance is excited. He does everything with me. He's possibly more excited than I am, he's got opinions on everything from food and music to napkins. I honestly wouldn't get married if I had one of those disengaged fiance's, if my fiance wasn't excited I would assume he didn't want to marry me.
My Dad loves weddings too, he gets very excited and gets his whole outfit dry cleaned before going to one. Our best man wanted to buy a whole new outfit for it. I think he was more happy about our announcement than most of our friends.
Maybe I just know a lot of nice men? 🤷

View Quoted Comment I agree he sounds like an insufferable grouch, unfortunately most guys I know don’t care for weddings. Marriage is very important to them but the wedding? They’d rather stay home.
My mom is basically forcing my dad to go, he loves me but weddings rub him the wrong way(they eloped)
My groom has cool ideas and is excited about the wedding but the actual hiring vendors stuff completely freaked him out for some reason. I think he had a lot of fun designing a cake together though and the decor shopping definitely made him excited! Half the cart was stuff he picked out!

I wouldn’t marry a guy that just expected to show up either.

I assigned him tasks aha.

I think it depends on the guy! My FH doesn't love wedding planning, but he still wants to be involved. Most of the time I pick something and ask his opinion and he just says "sure." But I know if I didn't ask him beforehand, it would probably hurt his feelings. We also have similar tastes in what we like and don't like. There has been a time or two where he doesn't agree and we do compromise. It's his wedding too!

I’m getting really no help from FH, but I expected that. I know it’s not that he doesn’t care about marriage, he just isn’t into party planning. I mean that’s basically what it is. Even when it comes to our sons birthday parties, he has no say. I’ll run things by him and if he really doesn’t like the idea or whatever he will say something but most of the time I get the response, “if that’s what you want and if that’s what makes you happy, then do it.” He trusts my taste and styling, which is nice, but sometimes I do wish he was a little more involved.

It really depends from person to person, so you can't have a general blanket statement. If I need help, I'll ask FH because it's his wedding too!

My FH is surprisingly active in our wedding planning and has actually made many of the final decisions. For example, he suggested our venue and it's what we decided on. He wants to upgrade our engagement photo package, so we added it to the budget. He wanted specific vases for out centerpieces, so we are using them. Instead of chargers at the tables, we wanted candles, so that's what we are doing. There are many others, not going to list them all. It's nice to know that it will be a wedding that we both created and love.

I mostly agree because my FH doesn't love going to weddings, although, he's really excited about ours. He's let me do most of the planning (but I still make sure he's okay with my decisions before I "officially" make them), but he has cared about the music! One day, he randomly told me he started putting together "must-play" songs for the DJ. That's the main task I've put him in charge of because he's always great at putting playlists together!

He was active because I was overwhelmed af. WE were both getting married, I couldn’t do it alone. That was a first glimpse into life with him. I assigned him tasks & deadlines because he’s not a planner at all. He def got his things done but I had to pull teeth at times.

My FH is 100% involved. While I do most of the in depth research he also looks into ideas and venue options. We decide everything together.

Wow what an archaic, sexist article you stumped upon. Most of my male friends love weddings since it’s the few times we gather in one place, drink like it’s college, and get to dance with one another.

My my husband loves weddings (except ours. He hates being the center of attention). He and I split the tasks and he picked stuff that was exciting to him and I, the same. We split the mutually unappealing tasks 50/50.

I think this is gendered nonsense that reinforces a stereotype.

FH has been very interested (if a bit lost and often put off by said gendering). He's made every decision with me (bar our attire, that was separate). He's in charge of the menu, of the music, of figuring out the license, and so on.

We tell boys they aren't supposed to care about this stuff, but that doesn't mean they don't. Some women hate all this, some love it, most are in between, so I don't understand why we don't allow space for everyone to feel any part of that.

1st try telling that to gay men. If men and wedding planning don’t mix no gay men would ever get married 🤷‍♀️

2nd my FH wants to have some involvement in the wedding planning. At the moment his main responsibility is to tell me I’m being ridiculous when I come to him with a new idea I thought of xD. But he does want a say in the decisions that are made for the wedding, all of it.

View Quoted Comment It's always nice to have someone plan with you, after all, the day is about the two of you.

View Quoted Comment Maybe.....

View Quoted Comment So how would you handle your fiance not wanting to be apart of the planning process?

View Quoted Comment What tasks? How did he feel about it? Did he complete them?

View Quoted Comment I also involved my husband by asking his opinion on a lot of things. I also had him make the hotel welcome bags and attend all major meetings with me.

View Quoted Comment How would you like him to help? Have you assigned him any tasks?