Guests Inviting Themselves

All you have to say is, "Unfortunately, we aren't able to invite everyone that we'd love to celebrate with. I hope we can have drinks to celebrate after the honeymoon."

What they said.

Exactly what pp said. I have been telling them "we are having a very small wedding so we can't invite everyone. I hope you understand."

I've had people comment on our Facebook pictures of some engagement pics saying "I better be invited!" And they aren't going to be invited, but I've just ignored the comments. Luckily I haven't had anyone say anything to me in person.

People at work have brought it up in company meetings putting me on the spot in front of 50+ people. I deflected it (can't remember exactly what I said), but it's really awkward. I've stopped talking about it all together at work and on Facebook.

I've only had one person ask me in person; but we just had to tell them that we are having a smaller wedding.

I did have my MOH ask if some of her friends could come after the dinner (even though she also had her BF invited) & my cousins told me at the reception/after dinner that they invited another friend to come out towards the end of the reception/hope I didn't mind. I've met the MOH's friend before, so it wasn't like I didn't know the people; but seriously...I've never just invited myself or others to weddings...kinda weird to say the least.

ETA Not to mention that there were certainly others I am closer to that we would have liked to invite; but didn't due to the budget; but here are these extra few people there were never going to be on our guest list...at our wedding reception. In the grand scheme of this...it didn't hurt anything; but was just annoying.

Yes and I pretty much said the same the @ALC did.

Not exactly the same. But we decided to have my FH niece and nephew as our ring bearer and flower girl since they are closest in relation and we're close to their parents.

I've had three cousins ask me if their kid can be in our wedding.

Ummmm,... what?

We never announced on any social media that we were engaged, saved the trouble of people asking about it. We jsut said "our venue and reception can only hold so many people, thank you for understanding." That took care if it!

Exactly. We say, "We are having a very small gathering. Close family and friends only. I hope you understand".

Lol. I did. And I ended up inviting them after saying several times not likely. They even said they would be fine being B-listed. I said the hell with it, if they want to come that bad... Why not. They will get an invite witg everyone else.

So far I've gotten away with ignoring or changing the subject but as it gets closer I'm sure I'll have to use the 'unfortunately we aren't able to invite everyone.'

Although there have been some people I'd like to just say no you're not invited and leave it at that, but that's not polite.

I've had people from high school I haven't seen in 14 years that have stated they would love to go. I just politely reply that we are keeping the guest list small to only include family and close friends.

At the same time, I'm a bartender. Every other customer thinks they spoils be invited. It's mostly the young kids that ask often. They just want a free meal and open bar. To them I have no problem telling them no way. And I'm not particularly nice about it.

I've had this happen to me so many times. I've kept a lot of the wedding planning to myself to avoid this but when we first announced our engagement on FB we got several comments from acquaintances demanding invitations. One even started "sad" reacting to the one or two wedding related things I've posted. So many of my friends share a picture of the venue, etc when they've booked stuff but I'm just not bothering because I'd rather not deal with the awkwardness of saying "you're not invited though".

I am dealing with this right now! I needed somewhere to talk about it and facebook is not the place lol. It makes me uncomfortable and our wedding is in 22 days and I still have people asking if they can come and they just won't eat.

Yep - "I will come to say hi" "Listen, I DID NOT INVITE YOU. FOR A REASON."

I would add "I am beginning to feel uncomfortable about this, could we move on?"

Just say we are keeping it small, thank you for your warm wishes.

Star - keep everything off FB - no engagement photos, nothing. People will come out of the woodwork to ask if they are invited!!!