Guests i don't like

I think for your FH you need to invite them. I’d recommend enlisting your bridesmaids and other friends to be the buffer between you and them. Your friends will have your back and help to ensure your wedding is great.

I’d invite them and say my hello and ignore/avoid her the rest of the evening. As long as you don’t think she will try to ruin the evening I wouldn’t let it bother me. You’ll be surrounded by so many other people who genuinely love and care for you don’t let her negativity get under your skin. People like that are miserable and want you to be too. Don’t take the bait.

Oh wow this is difficult.. okay, if it were me I would let my fiancé invite them but if they got on my nerves in the slightest I would have them removed from the party. Friend or not I’m not the type to stay quiet and let things go especially on mine and his special day. The woman sounds rude and the man sounds like a d bag. You know what as a matter of fact they both disrespected you so no I wouldn’t invite them I take my decision back 😂🤦🏽‍♀️

Invite them. Maybe they won't be able to make it?

If your FH feels strongly about keeping his friendship with this guy, maybe he needs to have a frank, honest conversation with him about how his and his wife’s behavior affect you. If he just wants to invite him so all the guys are back together and he feels like he should then maybe your FH should weigh if it’s truly worth it or not. This day is extremely important for the two of you as a pair. If you don’t ever plan on hanging with them during your married life, 10 years from now, etc, then maybe now is the time to cut the cord and avoid any unpleasant feelings on your day. If he is super close with this guy and sees him regularly then I think a conversation should be had. Either way, I don’t think you should just get over it and hope for the best. I’m a take action kinda gal. But that’s just me!

If it is giving you this much stress already, I wouldn't invite them. But that's coming from someone who doesn't have to live with your FH for the rest of my life. You are allowed to be a little selfish at your own wedding. They aren't family.

I'm in a similar situation. I feel your pain. I gave up and let the friend come because I realized I won't have to actually interact with the guy on my wedding day hardly at all. Just let them come and do not talk to the wife at all. Your FH is right, if he invites the others and not this friend, he will probably get confronted and have to explain the situation. So if he doesn't want to have that conversation, inviting them is the only way to avoid it. Sorry you have to deal with that!

Background: My FH has a group of friends from high school and they all still talk regularly and see each other enough that there is still that group mentality that if my FH invited the rest of the group, this particular friend (Kyle) would need to be invited too. I do not like him because he has never made me feel welcome (my FH and him lived in a house together our 2nd year of dating and I didn't even feel comfortable being at the house) and then we had a falling out 4 years ago come March where he drunkenly was an asshole and said horrible things to me. He never apologized and I never forgave him. We have not spoken or even seen each other in 4 years.

So I get it! People stink! Luckily we do not have to see them on a regular basis!

I had a situation sort of like this, but I never let anyone make me feel less than and you shouldn't either ( I know it's easier said than done). I would let your FH invite them, but I would steer clear. It's your day and I wouldn't even think about her. You are going to be surrounded by so much love and friendship that she will not exist.

I think you should probably invite them, ignore her, and enlist a specific person that isn't a scaredy cat to be in charge of controlling them or asking them to leave if she does even the slightest obnoxious thing. If you're assigning seats, tell your FH that your requirement for this compromise is they are seated as far away from you as possible

View Quoted Comment Yes far away!

Gosh, sorry for this problem! How big is your wedding? If it is going to be large and there will be lots of support for you personally, then that will be one thing. But if it is medium size or intimate then for me it would be difficult to avoid people who I feel are negative. But I am an empath and I feel everyone's energy in the room. I'm having a very small wedding family only, because involving friends is too much drama unfortunately... perhaps you can assign her a "special" job lol, to keep her out of your way... bathroom attendant🤭? Just kidding. Ask her to be Honorary Support Photographer (with a special camera) for all the fun candid shots? If she thinks she has to do something responsible maybe she won't show up .... but if she does at least she will be busy...
*Sometimes* for the people who ignore you, focusing extra attention on them somehow shifts the energy. Not kissing their ass, but letting them think they are important, melts their hardness for a bit (which deep down is self dislike/hate). Like reverse psychology, ultimately for your personal benefit on your day. You know the situation best of course. Be honest with your fiance and see what you can come up with. Best wishes!