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Savvy May 2021

Guest List

Taylor, on December 31, 2019 at 10:00 AM Posted in Planning 1 10

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I need som serious help with my guest list. Right now, we are sitting at about 100 guest, but a lot of the people on the list are, what I am calling, “courtesy invites.” Meaning they are cousins or aunts and uncles who I do not believe will actually attend, but who would be offended if they do not receive an invitation. The actual amount of people I except to show up is about 60, which makes it very hard to plan things out!! Part of me wants to just go with around 60 as our number, but I’m afraid if I do that luck will have it that all those aunts and uncles and cousins will show up, leaving me utterly unprepared. Does anyone have any advice on this???

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10 Comments

Latest activity by Suzanne, on January 27, 2020 at 11:41 AM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on December 31, 2019 at 10:13 AM
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You should plan for every single guest that you invite, to attend. That way when people decline, it's a pleasant surprise, budget-wise anyway.
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Dedicated September 2020
Ellen · on December 31, 2019 at 10:16 AM
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As someone who was assuming the courtesy invites wouldn’t come.... most are. Plan for the 100 and adjust accordingly!
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Champion July 2019
Veronica · on December 31, 2019 at 10:49 AM
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I would plan for every single guest to attend. You will be surprised by who accepts and who declines. There were people we thought would definitely attend, but didn't and vice versa.
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VIP August 2021
Jennifer · on December 31, 2019 at 12:14 PM
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I agree, plan for however many you are sending invites to!
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Master January 2015
null · on December 31, 2019 at 1:45 PM
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Completely agree with PP's. Plan for the maximum number of people possible, not the estimate in your head. It's not super common, but there are couples who have had 100% attendance or close to it! Better safe than sorry
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Dedicated October 2021
Christina · on December 31, 2019 at 3:31 PM
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My rule of thumb was to plan the budget as if every person would show, but in the same respect, be mindful of any “minimums” you have to worry about. If you’re inviting 100 guests, plan to pay for 100 guests, but if you’re expecting 60 guests, don’t book a room with an 80 person minimum!
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Master May 2020
Kari · on December 31, 2019 at 4:24 PM
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I made a spreadsheet and ranked every single person on it, with 0s being immediately family "absolutely invited", 1s being wedding party, 2s being close friends, and so on. I included a column for significant others (so we'd know if each guest was solo or part of a couple), "who" they were for (me or my FH), and other details (including date conflicts, so we didn't end up picking a date where his sister was traveling for work, etc). I then sorted the spreadsheet by rank, and from there we could see how many people were at each cutoff. We wanted around 60-80 guests and 80 ended up being the perfect cutoff for all of our 3s, and we ended up with an almost perfectly even split of "his" guests and "my" guests. By creating a list and sorting it that way, we also have all of our backup guests ranked and in order for when we start getting RSVPs of "no" and want to go further down the list. Worked really well for us!
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on January 1, 2020 at 12:41 AM
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Only invite the number of guests you can afford to host.

If you want 60, cut all the aunts and uncles. That way nobody can (theoretically be upset if none were invited). If anyone asks you can say you’re having a small wedding, immediate family.
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Dedicated June 2022
Jess · on January 10, 2020 at 11:24 AM
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Plan for all to attend but make a B-list for guests. Send the original ones out early and request RSVP's. Send out new ones to one person at a time on your B-list with each decline you get.
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Dedicated July 2021
Suzanne · on January 27, 2020 at 11:41 AM
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Several people I planned to invite originally said that they were not available for my wedding (same day as grandmother's birthday, study abroad trip for school, etc.) Now that I've sent out save the dates, those people who originally said they had conflicts for that day can now make it! In the end, you never know who will or will not be able to make it to your wedding. Plan on everyone that you invite coming.
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