Guest List....

Can you afford to host a 500 person wedding? People can get upset and have their feelings but that doesn’t mean you need to change your plans.

Definitely agree with PP - have the wedding you want and can afford! You'll burn out trying to make everyone happy. Do what works for you

Even 200 is a lot of people, and I can’t imagine 500! Think about who is important to you and FH and who you’ve seen/spoken to in the last year or so and start trimming down your guest list from there.

How many people can you afford to host?

Like you, I could have easily 500 people be invited to my wedding. After listing out my must invite guest, I was at about 200 people. I capped the wedding at 300 to account for the people I didn’t know that my family would be inviting (FH family is small and I already included their closest friends since I knew them). I also felt 300 was a good compromise that I could afford. When I was looking at venues, I was looking for places that held minimum 250 and max ~400. Settled on venue that fell right in the venue and worked with our budget. Mom still thinks it’s too small but deposit is already placed, so deal with it Mom! Lol

Also how set are you on these 2 venues? If you absolutely feel like they’re your dream venue, stick with your original plan. It’s ultimately yours and SO day, so you get to chose who’s invited and where to host it.

We had 15 guests at our DW, 50 guests at our local reception. Our priorities were the venues, food, open bar & entertainment so we kept our guest lists small. No regrets!

What kind of reception are you planning... cake & punch? Catered buffet? Have you priced out that stuff yet? The more guests = more money, not just on food costs but seating, place settings, linens & other rentals.

Honestly you need to invite the ones that have been there for you both and won’t just show up to eat the food then leave. Me and my FH are paying $30 a plate and have 115 people on our list which $3,450.00 so 200 is a lot cause you have to think about when the bridal party is taking photos where will the guest be? Reserving another room for the guest will be another $300-400 added to y’all budget. If they start sitting around they’ll eventually leave then your out of money for the reception.

It doesn’t matter who is upset, that doesn’t change your budget.

I only invited 80. I would only invite who you want there.

We have 100 for our wedding.

View Quoted Comment My fiancé said we will try and see what we can do/find to include more people. But it’s going to be tough. I have to do a lot of DIYs and alternatives. Let’s hope and pray.

View Quoted Comment 🥰 I already had the whole weekend planned for one venue and how/where I want the photos taken and stuff. The two locations were “Ever After Farm” - the blueberry farm and “The Lake House” -FP.

View Quoted Comment I’m doing a Buffet. I’m trying to find an alternative for the wedding cake/desert. I want the family and friends that were with us and knew us through our whole relationship. But if I don’t invite majority of my family members they well look/talk (disrespectful) at my parents badly and I don’t want that.

I couldn’t imagine a wedding with 500 people, the catering would cost a fortune. Just remember this is your wedding. It is about you and your future spouse, not anyone else. Don’t let others tell you what you “need/should” do.

View Quoted Comment But DIYing decorations isn’t going to save you a ton of money because that’s not where the majority of money will be spent. Catering is where the money goes. Unless you’re doing something insanely cheap like bbq and are planning to spend $6k+ on restaurant drop off catering. Alcohol will be a ton of money as well. Not sure what your overall budget is.

It all comes down to your budget. Are you and FH paying for this? Your parents? His parents? All? If the budget can accommodate 500 people then you have no worries. 500 people at a catered event is going to cost an enourmas amount of money. My venue is also our caterer. We are paying $75.00 a person, but we are eloping, or having a private DW ceremony, and we are having no more than 20 people. I know this is stressful and I'm so sorry!!

Make a guest list with FH. Only count the people who you want to be there. Then be realistic with your parents about your budget. Tell them you can only afford so many people at $xxx per person and that 500 people is not an option. See if they would be willing to help budget for more at their expense if it is that important.