My fiancees family has been all over the place throughout the process and is also not contributing (except for a sunday brunch). We asked for a guest list months ago and my fiancee called his mother and they agreed to move certain individuals to a B list. Apparently, she forgot the conversation and this resulted in her screaming at me about who was and who was not sent save the dates. Literally SCREAMING to the point that I had to hang up the phone. She claims that people we had sent save the dates to were not on her list (but it was sent via email so it was all in writing) and while she was screaming she told me we removed the people who would be giving us money and the people left (who are mostly younger) would not give us good gifts etc. Of course, we're not planning on a return on our investment. That would be a terrible way to make money. She never apologized, I actually apologized and said sorry she was so upset.
Now we're ordering invitations and she wants to remove 2 people who we sent save the dates to which I think is extremely tactless and replace them with 4 others. Two of the replacements she told me to remove previously because she was not invited to their birthday party.
We have a long B list and she's contributing $0 to the wedding after she previously made commitments she has not been able to fulfill. She has also told us that she's now thinking of contributing but it's months before the wedding so the budget's figured out. Is it too much to say that those 4 can stay on the B list? It seems like she feels entitled to these guest spots.
My fiancee's family also just let me know that if his dad (his parents are divorced) has a girlfriend by November he wants to be able to have a +1. I feel like if he's been dating someone for less than 3 months I don't want her at my wedding, also he's not contributing, and he's been married and divorced 3 times so for me it personally feels gross.
