Guest list, how to reduce it!

Who is paying?

70 is about half the guest list, are they paying at all? No pay, no say.

Sherry, at the end of the day, if your parents are paying for the wedding, they get the ultimate say on the guest list. Your fiance's parents can contribute a list of people they WANT to invite, but they need to understand that you won't be able to invite all of them. Ask them to prioritize the list for you.

Pay for it yourself and invite only who you want to.

If they are not paying, then you can give them a number if people to invite. They will have to accept it or kick in some money.

Nope. They don't get to pick who to invite unless they want to pay for them.

Ask them to pay for the increased amount of people if they dont then let them know you will have to break it down by people who you guys as a couple want at your wedding

I'd take control of the guest list again and divvy it up by how many invites each person gets (your parents, you, your fiance, your fiance's parents). Tell them the number they get and have that be the end of the conversation!

https://publications.weddingwire.com/h/i/271308933-weddingwire-guest-list-guide-2016

I don't think it's fair that FH's side wants to invite 70 guests (almost half the wedding) and isn't paying a cent. Traditionally, they would get 50, your parents would get 50, and you'd get 50. Nowadays, I think that's changed because the FH's family used to pay for alcohol, honeymoon, etc. If they are literally paying for nothing at all, I think 50 guests would be a very very generous amount of people to invite, but they shouldn't even demand that. FH needs to talk to them and explain that if they aren't hosts, they don't decide these things.

We choose the size of our guest list, put down the family and friends we wanted to be there and told both our parents how many people they could invite. They didn't like it at first but we stuck it out and they made their choices.

This sounds like my situation aswell. FH side has more guests and we are paying for it. With the sass from FH side.. good luck to you and stand your ground. I am trying to do the same.

Traditionally? How far back does this tradition go? Decades ago when we got married, I invited 50 people and he invited fifty people. No one else was consulted or asked to submit a list

Either they can cut their list or you can do it for them.

I'm in a similar situation. We started cutting his side by removing people I haven't met- If they're really that close and important, wouldn't I have met them over the last three years? Then, we cut people who he simply has not seen since he was a child. Just because you're related doesn't mean they're close and warrant an invite.