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Savvy October 2020

Guest List Dilemma

Katie, on January 15, 2020 at 1:39 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 4

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Hi All,

My fiancé and I are struggling with our guest list. He has cousins on his dad's side that he doesn't talk to or have much of a relationship with, but we were invited to their weddings/up-coming weddings and most we didn't attend, plus some I have never met or met like twice in our 9 years together. We are already at the top of our budget and cutting people is the only place we have left, I'm wondering if it's okay to not invite these cousins? The thing is, he is close with one family on that side so they are coming but we aren't sure if it's okay to invite some but not all, ya know?
Any advice and help would be great. It's been really stressful and we are just trying to make all this work. Thanks!

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Latest activity by Sherry, on January 15, 2020 at 2:42 PM

Master February 2020
Amber · on January 15, 2020 at 1:55 PM
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Short answer: It's your wedding and you and your FH can do whatever you want, even if others don't like it.
Long answer: I would advise against inviting some and not all cousins from one side of the family. I totally understand where you're coming from, I'm completely estranged from my mom's side of the family, but I was invited to my cousins wedding so she and her siblings are invited to mine. To paraphrase my parents "it's how things are". Of course, no one is entitled to an invitation to your wedding, but I guarantee that picking and choosing relatives to invite will definitely hurt feelings. So if you don't want to invite them, that's completely up to you, I would just be prepared for some backlash/family drama.
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Savvy October 2020
Katie · on January 15, 2020 at 2:02 PM
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Hi,
Yes you're so right! I appreciate you taking the time to comment. The only issue is, there is drama with invite and without because you're right it might cause issues if some are there and some are not, but at his brother's wedding everyone was invited and there ended up being a fight from their moms side and their dads side. It's just so stressful either way.
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VIP August 2021
Jennifer · on January 15, 2020 at 2:21 PM
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If they all caused a fight at the last wedding, I wouldn't invite any of them then! It saves you money and the fear of them repeating their behavior on your day!
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Master September 2019
Sherry · on January 15, 2020 at 2:42 PM
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It is completely up to you who you invite to your wedding but I will say that I have issues with my SIL. I could have invited my brother and not her but they are a package deal. I avoided all drama and had an amazing wedding day, stress free but not inviting either of them. It hardly seems worth the stress to extend an invite to people that are possibly going to cause drama on your big day. Good luck!
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Guest List Dilemma

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