Guest anxiety

I wouldn't say that RSVPs mean nothing, especially for a wedding. IMO, RSVPing to a wedding carries a little more weight. If you are worried about it, keep in contact with your guests prior to your wedding day. Letting them know personally how excited you are that they will attend may make them more inclined to actually attend.

You're typing my nightmare. We have spent SO much on food and booze that if people who have said "yes" don't come? You may see me on the news.

That's a fear of mine also. Definitely when we have to guarantee a certain number of plates. I guess the way I am looking at it is I don't want anyone there that doesn't want to be there.

I think that nowadays people understand that weddings cost per head and that an RSVP means you need to be there unless something like sickness, emergency, babysitter issues, etc. come up. It's not your typical party. I know it's hard not to think about it but try to think positive thoughts. Your day is going to be amazing with everyone that shows up

Yes, stay positive and do kindly explain how important this day is to you and that you really want those invited to be there. I too share this concern, so I hear you.

That's why it's so important when making up your guest list that you invite only those you know will come. Not the ones you haven't spoken to in years or long lost relatives just to make a high count. The most important people in your life now will show up.

@Mother of the bride, that's a sweet to look at it, but not very realistic. There are tons of stories about people no-showing to weddings and most of the time, we're not talking about long lost relatives, but siblings and other family and friends. It happens and it's anxiety-provoking for many.

This is my nightmare!!! Good thing my mom has a big family?

The same thing has happened to me for just about every event in the past couple years! Honestly I'm really just kinda banking on the fact that a wedding is kind of more of a "big deal" than other parties. I mean considering you have to PICK your meal and send back the card. I feel like that right there requires more commitment than just texted "yeah I'll be there". At least I really hope!

I have similar fears, especially since my wedding is on a Sunday. I also have to meet a F/B minimum for my venue so that adds to the guest count anxiety too.

Though, if I'm really being honest, I think the anxiety for me is less financially based, but rather comes more from a place of wanting to feel special, and if less people show up than expected or than invited, it feels like I'm not special enough for them to make the effort.

The rational part of me knows this isn't true, but that's why this is an IRrational fear!

ETA: Your wedding will be amazing, regardless of guest count. Spend a few minutes letting yourself worry about it, then accept that worrying about it is not going to change anything that happens the day-of, so you should try to focus your energy on things you can control

Kim, I am right there with you! Nothing infuriates me more than a no-show after RSVP'ing. You can't control what other people do or say BUT for the sake of your guests and the vibes that are sent out into the universe from your reception (or any event you host), concentrate on ONLY the good and comment on your happiness to those who showed. "Your guests deserve to hear your appreciation, not your disappointment." I understand and hard is it may be, enjoy those who did commit.

ETA : I liked your post because I understand.

Awww! I hope it all works out for you. I have anxiety about these kinds of things, as well. Seriously no fun wondering if your friends and family will be there for you during such a special time!

Erin: I feel the same! (The specialness irrational fear!)

What Matt said ^

Try to stay positive.