I will try to keep this as short as possible, apologies in advance. So my FH has a complicated family. Not only does he have a large family, but his situation has been complicated since he was born. His mother and father have never been married, and broke up when he was about 2 years old. Additional context - My FH was born outside the USA and his entire family eventually moved here and became citizens. The first people to leave and start the process of becoming citizens were his parents. This took about 5 years. While Mom & Dad were here in the US two things happened, first he was raised by his grandparents (dad's side) from 2-7 years old (who he is still very close to them this day, he calls them mom & dad as well). Second, while bio mom & dad were in the US becoming citizens, bio dad cheated and started a family with another woman in the US and left bio mom out to dry and fend for herself in a new country. When FH came to the US it was a total shock that bio dad was out of the picture and he continued to be until FH was about 18 years old. It took bio dad a while but he finally came back into FH's life many years later. They have an interesting relationship, definitely not would I would call a standard father/son relationship, but the main point is that they both really want to be in each other's lives.
Now here is the issue. FH & I are starting to talk about who is in the wedding party and who will walk down the aisle. Outside of bridesmaids, groomsmen, and flower girls, I will just be having my parents walk down the aisle. FH wants Bio mom & step-dad, Bio dad-& step-mom, and grandma & grandpa. I am fine with this amount of people walking down the aisle, the problem is that one day his mom and I were talking, and she told me that she knows his dad will be at the wedding and she is fine with that, but that she does not want to be near him, see him, or have anything to do with him at all if possible. When I told my FH that his mom would be really upset if he asked his bio dad to walk down the aisle, FH got upset and said she would just have to deal with it. This shocks me as he loves his mother very much and has ALWAYS been extremely respectful and supportive of her. I think he has this idyllic moment planned in his head where he sees his mom, dad, and grandparents all walk down the aisle in peace & happiness. I really want that to be the case too, but I just don't know if that will happen and I feel put in the middle of this situation a bit. I don't want my MIL to be upset, FIL to be upset, and especially my FH to be upset. I don't even know how to approach this issue. HELP.
