Not sure how to handle this, if I even need to, and if I
should even care.
My fiancé and I are in one of those situations where we are paying for most of
our wedding on our own. Which is fine to me- because WE are the ones getting
married, not the parents/in-laws.
However, my parents are helping with a few financial things with the wedding,
where they can. They told us ahead of time they will help with what they are
able, but they want to be involved in everything. They are super excited that I’m
getting married, and they love and adore my fiancé. Almost every night my mom
is calling me and talking to me about plans and thoughts and ideas she had, she
bounces ideas off of me, and runs to the stores after work and picks up things
she thinks would be cute to add to the wedding, or my ideas I’ve had. It’s been
great having that support, especially with trying to plan things alone.
However, when it comes to my fiancés side, I have known his family and parents
for over 16 years. We have been dating for 2 years and engaged for 4 months. They
know me. But when it comes to the wedding, they have not a care in the world. I
know traditionally the “brides parents take care of everything”- but to not get
anything as simple as a “where are you at with the plans? How are things going?”.
I have tried to include them in things, I have had the, come to see the venue,
ask their opinions on food, and decorations, I have tried to get their input. But
they just do not seem to care in the least. There is no excitement, no
happiness, no attempt in offering help either financially or planning wise… you
would think they would be excited that their baby boy is getting married. I don’t
need their help or enthusiasm I have my AMAZING parents, but I feel SO
incredibly bad for my fiancé. All he wants is his parents giving him love and
support- and I know at the end of the day he just needs to sit down and talk
with them and figure out why their doing what they are doing, or lack of doing.
Has anyone else experienced this? One side of the other just plainly not caring
about the wedding, or their kid getting married?
And any advice or things we can say or do? What exactly can I do or say?
Side note - When their daughter got engaged and married, they were so crazy about it, happy, talking about it, posting about it- I was thinking, well maybe they just have lost that energy... but that is not a justifiable reason. It's their son... they should be treating him and his wedding the same as their daughters - at least in my eyes.
There is no bad blood... their family is pretty close knit. That is why I'm just a little lost here
