Groom needs help

The wedding is yours as well so you do get a say in who you would like to be a part of the wedding. Not sure the gender of your grandchildren but could any of them be a ring bearer? Also, you can have multiple flower girls. We are having two for ours plus 1 ring bearer and their old brother is an usher (he's 15). It doesn't sound like your fiancee is being fair. There is no reason her "grandchild" can be included but not your grandchildren. I would tell her that either yours can be included or none of them are included. My fiance has told me no to thinks and we talk it out. Just because I am the bride doesn't mean I overrule him because at the end of the day this wedding is both of ours.

What Vanessa said.

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100% this. The whole purpose of a wedding is to celebrate the two of you as a couple, not to throw a party for her.

The wedding is for both of you. Both of you clearly want your grandchildren involved. You'll probably want a ring bearer, perhaps one of the grandchildren can do that. I think she should let you involve them

I’m sorry this is happening.

The wedding is for BOTH people, not just the Bride.

And that said having the 2 4yo cuties walk down together would be perfect! But it would be even cuter to have all 4!

Does she say why this is what she wants? And if this little one is her “grandchild” does it matter if it’s bio? I do get your point tho: you have 3 bio granddaughters and she has none and wants this little human as the Only flower girl..

You should definitely have a say in it as it is not just her wedding. I would say it’s all 4 kids or none, it’s not like there are 15 kids and she’s only picking one. It’s not fair to you at all, the bride doesn’t get to make all the choices

I think at a minimum you need to have both 4 year olds as flower girls. It’s only fair! The girls not in the wedding are going to feel left out.

I don't really get why there can't be multiple flower girls

View Quoted Comment I completely agree.

Just like in marriage, couples need to sometimes make compromises when wedding planning. I think this is one of those times. You deserve your wants as much as she does.