So FH and I booked a dinner at our favorite restaurant in aroom that holds 40 people, we have large immediate family and we assumed we would have 35 people. FMIL has insisted I include Godparents in like ALL of the wedding activities even though FH never told me he even had godparents, so I assumed she would want godparents and grandparents at RD since she's been so nit picky on everything else. So we booked the place that holds 40 people and with 35 people we meet their min cost requirement to use the space.
Well now FMIL said "don't invite godparents and grandparents, they will feel obligated to come and it's a 2 hour drive". Dinner will be served at 7 and we are planning to talk right away while people eat so that everyone could leave after they eat if they can't stay. All of FH's family is from the same area so they all can carpool if needed or someone can pick up grandma and grandpa but I think FMIL just doesn't want to pick them up so she doesn't want us to invite them even though she's acted like they'll be offended if I didn't included them in everything else.
So now I'm not sure what to do, do I send an invite to grandparents and godparents and say "hey, no pressure we just want you to know you're welcome" or do I eat the money for 6 people not attending our 35 person minimum and follow FMIL wishes to not invite them? It was FMIL's idea not to invite these people, we have no clue how the grandparents and godparents would really feel.
