Gothic Fairytale Wedding

Oh boy.: forget the bouquet.. That's a pretty creative bouquet for a goth wedding. When the ladies on here hear a wedding in the backyard ..

Be prepared for are you self-catering? Making family work on your day? Etc

Fiance's sister is doing our wedding cake and we are still deciding on that. Our dog Bambi will be part of the wedding too

Mine was in our backyard but yes you have to rent everything

The bouquet is gorgeous, I am doing mine the same way but all white with feathers. It's a very easy DIY, but can get pricey when it come to brooches.

C'mon now, Natalie. You have been around here enough to know that using friends and family as vendors is a terrible idea. Get a baker and let your FSIL attend as an honored guest, rather than stressing out and working her fingers to the bone. Cakes are a big effort, and even if she knows what she is doing it requires a ton of last minute work and stress. If you are doing this to save money (backyard weddings can be significantly more expensive) get a small tiered cutting cake from the grocery store, and a sheet cake to supply enough slices. You can have a lovely wedding without using family to do it.

I get what your saying but my fiancé and I agree on it and once something is agree on there is no changing it. I'm also having a small wedding where it is most of his family and a few of my family since I'm not close to many of my family members

So if you both agree to do something rude and inconsiderate of your guests you will not revisit that idea, no matter how obvious it is that that was a poor choice? It's impossible that you guys make mistakes that need to be corrected, as all human beings do? It's your wedding, your guest list, and your family, so you guys making the decisions is totally appropriate. But not revisiting this decision is a mistake.

One something is agreed on you don't change it? I'm sorry, that's no way to run a wedding OR a life.

Backyard weddings are almost never cost savers and almost never easier. Every single one of them I've officiated at has been late, confused and chaotic except those with coordinators and pro caterers. Get estimates for everything you need to rent and a caterer. You'll be shocked how fast that stuff adds up.

Natalie - if your motto is, "once FH and I agree on something there is no changing it", be prepared for some major hurdles in life. Things change, situations change, life changes. Part of being a responsible adult is being able to adapt to said changes.

Nothing wrong with a small backyard wedding, but you might want to prioritize rentals for the wedding (chairs, tables, bathrooms, etc.) over your dress, bouquet, and invitations; especially so on those last three because your wedding is in 2018.

Also, I agree with Celia and JamieLynn about that mindset. That may help avoid indecision, but as JamieLynn said, things change and you must adapt to those changes, even if it goes against your plans.

ETA: Not even touching the friendor cake issue.

Natalie, do what you need to do! My cousins had a backyard wedding and a lot of the family stepped in with their areas of expertise to make it a special and beautiful day for her. It wasn't stressful, we love her and would do it all again. People on here like to judge- just ignore!

@Samantha, please copy-paste where people are being judgmental.

Is your FSIL a professional baker? Baking a wedding cake is different than baking a birthday cake.

I'd look into small ceremony and restaurant reception. Its a lot cheaper. Having it in your backyard means you have to rent tents, tables, seats (You must have a seat for every butt), linens, dishes, cutlery, stereos, toilets, etc. It adds up quickly!

Samantha: it's about etiquette not judgement, becaue this is an etiquette based board. It's very poor etiquette to host a wedding you can't afford, and to have guests working at and for a party that is your "thank you" to them for attending the ceremony. I am glad your cousin had a nice wedding and that you enjoyed helping. That still does not make it correct etiquette and, again, this is an etiquette based board. I would never invite a group of people over to my house for dinner and then have one make dinner, one make dessert, one iron my linens, etc. That's rude. It's my party and I am responsible for only hosting what I am willing and able to host properly. If you wouldn't do it at a dinner party, you certainly shouldn't be doing it at a wedding. Family are particularly honored guests and should never be working at a party to thank them.

I'm not a huge fan of fabric/fake flower bouquets but I can see how yours ties in with your theme and think it looks nice.

Rentals can get expensive very quickly, but you may find some good deals and have it work out. I was looking at having an outside wedding at my friend's vacation home and after the cost of the tent and everything else it would have been double what I ended up paying for my venue. As other's have already said, be prepared for the amount of rental items you will need. That includes dealing with the clean up after the event.

One of my good friends offered to bake our wedding cake but I turned her down. It's really best to have all of your guests simply enjoy your wedding and celebrate with you without any added duties during the wedding.

I'm still on my first cup of coffee...

Please don't have family work your wedding. Having a backyard wedding is totally fine, but don't have anyone except hired professional vendors bring food, or cake. It's wrong on so many levels. I'm not being judgmental at all by the way. Let your family enjoy themselves. Even if they offer, you should turn them down, trust me, they will appreciate it!

Also, don't listen to those that tell you "it's your day!" Or "you do you!", they are full of shit. Yes, it's your wedding day, but your hosting guests, and when you host, it should be about them.

I like the bouquet!

I also like the bouquet, but for a gothic wedding maybe something like lavender, red or very very dark red roses would be more in keeping with the theme? It depends on the rest of the decor or course, but when I think "gothic fairytale" I don't immediately think of white.

Can someone please explain to me what "Gothic Fairytail" means? In my mind, I can't picture this..

@JamieLynn it is still big and dramatic like a fairytale but has elements that are a little darker,like deep red roses, maybe some skulls and possibly other black and red accents; cinderella meets tim burton

I agree that white doesn't really fit what I'm picturing for a gothic bouquet.