Giving the bride away

If you really think it would hurt your father if he didn't walk you down, just have both him and your mom do it.

I second what MissMadeline said, or have your dad walk you down the aisle halfway, and then have your mom join the two of you the rest of the way.

Can they both walk you down the aisle? I know some friends who have done this.

So, it's actually a Jewish tradition (that's really becoming popular) to have both parents walk you down the aisle. That is totally an option.

However, your feelings about being given away are ones that are important. It doesn't sound like you want your bio-dad to walk you down the aisle. I don't think you should feel like a bad person for just wanting your mom to walk you down.

I walked my daughter down the aisle, and gave her away. It was VERY important to her, and frankly, I/we did not care what her "Dad" thought. He had his chance to be in her life, and he deserved his hurt feelings, if he had them.

My dad was the same. Only now, after going through life with a less than adequate father, do I forgive him. He is old now. But...my son is still walking me down the aisle.

It may sound bitchy, but I think we need to take ownership of our weddings and put the possibility of hurt feelings, on the back burner. I know I do not want to look back and wish I did things the way that they mattered to me, instead of guarding others feelings.

Is your mom concerned about hurting your dad or your stepdad's feelings? I think that asking her would be the most neutral option as you didn't pick one dad over the other. If you ask your biological father, it sounds like you could hurt your stepdad's feelings. Your mom is the one constant in your life, so I think you should give her the honor.

Have you even discussed this with your step-dad? you might be surprised that he will support your idea of your mom walking you down the aisle. When the officiant says "who gives the bride away?" they could both say "we do" if you want him included.

I like the idea of your mom waiting half way. So come out with step-dad and at some point mom/dad will walk you together. This really depends on your ceremony site though. I.e. with a church it might be more difficult but an outside ceremony, you could walk with step dad up to the beginning of the aisle, where mom waits, and then the rest of the aisle you all walk together. That way you have a moment with step-dad but also have your mom give you away.

Nevertheless, I would talk with your step-dad first. Just tell him you are torn because they both mean so much to you but you want to honor your mom for having been that strong woman in your life for the 15 years she raised you alone.

My mom and my step-dad will both be walking me down the aisle.

Have both! They both loved and supported you, so give them equal honor on your big day!

I agree, let both do it. When my best friend got married, I shot the wedding, and both her mom and stepdad (who she also considered her dad) walked her down the aisle and "gave her away" Why not?

As everyone has said you can totally have both of them walk you down the aisle, but if you don't want to do that I say you should have a conversation with your dad (who I'm assuming is actually your stepdad) and see how he feels about it.

I was going to say what everyone else said and have both.

As a wedding officiant I am often asked about this question.

Here's one option: Have your mother walk you down the aisle and hand you off to the groom. Your mother will take a seat and the ceremony will begin.

During the introduction and opening remarks, the officiant will include both sets of parents from the bride and groom:

The relationship between children and their parents is one that’s often understated, yet very deep. And one of the rare occasions when it can be publicly acknowledged is at a wedding ceremony. On this occasion, BRIDE’s parents proudly stand here beside their daughter representing her family. And GROOM’s parents proudly stands beside their son representing his family. They are displaying, for all of us to see, their individual and combined love for BRIDE and GROOM. Who brings this man and woman to be married to each other? “We do.”

See more options here: http://www.officianteric.com/giving-away-the-bride

I was going to suggest having them both walk you down the aisle.

My half-sister had both my dad and her mom walk her down the aisle.

You could walk alone.

or

Your mom could start the walk with you, step-dad joining in half way down the aisle.

I ask, "Who stands with this wo/man to represent her/his family and its traditions?" Then all parents (step included) can reply, "We do."

My situation is so ridiculously close to yours I thought I was reading my life story, no joke lol. I was just going to have my step dad walk me down the aisle but the more and more I think about it, my mom is the MOST important person in my life so why wouldn't I have her walk me down?! I really think I'm going to have both of them walk me down the aisle. I don't care if people think it's weird or non traditional. I say have both of them walk you down. Not only will it make both your mom and step dad happy I think when you look back on your wedding day, you will be happy that you chose to have both of them. Hope this helps!!

Edit for spelling.

I think you should talk to your stepdad and see what he thinks and feels, but I would have both of them walk you down the aisle or you can have your stepdad walk you down and your mom meet you halfway or your mom walk you and your stepdad meet you half way I've seen this in a few weddings.

Well I think it seems pretty unanimous, and I don't know why I didn't think of that! Thank you all so much. I'm going to ask them both to walk me down.

I think you should have your biological father walk you half way down the aisle and have your mom and step dad meet you half way and take you to the alter. I have been a guest and a vendor at a wedding when this has happened. It's classy and respectful all at the same time.