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December 2019

Gifts for technically not bridesmaids

gh323, on November 5, 2019 at 9:04 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 6

We are having a relatively small wedding, and we do not have a bridal party. The only thing I asked of my closest friend was to give a speech at the reception. That said, two of my closest friends planned a nice bachelotte party for me (paint & sip, followed by dinner at my favorite restaurant), and the one giving a speech helped my mom with the shower (although I'm certain my mom did not ask her to pay for anything - it was held at my parents' house and my mom provided the food).

I know typically brides will give their bridal party gifts. I want to thank them both for everything they've done, while also keeping in mind that since it's not a typical bridal party they haven't had to pay for dresses or shoes, pay for makeup, plan a bachelorette weekend in another city, etc. The night before the wedding, I am taking them for mani/pedi ($60 each at the salon I go to). Do you think this is a sufficient gesture of thanks? Should I be giving them something in addition? If so, how much? Like I said -- I definitely want to show them my thanks, without breaking our small budget.

6 Comments

Latest activity by Williams, on December 6, 2019 at 5:54 AM
  • Jennifer
    VIP October 2021
    Jennifer ·
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    That should be good. Maybe get a little water bottle with their name? And drop a fav alcohol in it?
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  • Cherry
    Expert February 2020
    Cherry ·
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    I think a mani/pedi is a great gift. If you're already a giver and just love having excuses to buy your friends gifts then sure, add something small to it.

    But considering your budget...

    A Thank You card might suffice. If they don't already know about the mani/pedi, you could give them each a card of thanks with a note about taking them to get spoiled. Or when you take them to the salon, give them each a small bag with nail polish and hand lotion or cuticle oil, etc. to make a theme out of it.

    The good news is they already know they're not bridesmaids so they're likely not expecting anything at all. So anything you do, even if it is a small gesture, will be appreciated.

    TBH, you don't ever need an excuse to give a friend a gift. 😉
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  • M
    Expert September 2020
    Marcia ·
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    I also don’t have a bridal party but my best friend is serving as “first assistant to the bride”(like DOC).

    I found a handbag by her favorite designer at a very reasonable price and I’ve been filling it as I go with some of her favorite goodies as well as some of my favorites. I’m planning on leaving it in her hotel room and she will see it when she arrives.
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  • Christina
    Dedicated October 2021
    Christina ·
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    I would say that if you decided to just stick with the mani/pedi that would absolutely be okay! If you really wanted to do something more, you could still keep it small like pp said maybe a personalized water bottle, or you could do a tumbler, makeup bag/clutch (check Etsy!) I think it’s completely up to you what you would like to do. Personally I wanted to go big with my bridesmaid proposals, but I’ve decided to frame a photo of us as the gift with just a card saying “will you be my bridesmaid” maybe if you have any photos you could do that!
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  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
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    Obviously, tastes differ. But I cannot imagine ever considering someone providing me with a mani and pedi, whether worth $50 or $300, that I would consider a trade for Hank you gift. It is an act of grooming, and very short lived, and clearly something chosen because you are doing it , and like company, not like a more thoughtful personal gift. For a thank you, that does not have to be expensive, choose like it is that person's birthday. Something just for that person, showing you appreciate them as individual, a friend. Not anything to go with grooming for your wedding, or something to wear in your wedding pics. Those are sort of in the same category as a man who gives his wife housekeeping tools. Much needed and useful, yes, but something that says, I appreciate the way you keep house, and this will help you do it easier/better. When a personal gift of affection is wanted. Whether a hard to find DVD, or something pretty, or a hammock, or blown glass Christmas ornaments or home baked cookies not to be shared, something not about grooming for your wedding . Show you notice their personal preferences, likes and dislikes.
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  • Cher Horowitz
    Master December 2019
    Cher Horowitz ·
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    I would shop for them like it's their birthday Smiley smile

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