Jessica
Just Said Yes October 2021

Gifts at rehearsal dinner for bridal party?

Jessica, on July 19, 2021 at 11:16 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 18
Saved
Reply
Hi friends. So I know it’s typical to give your bridal party their gifts during the rehearsal dinner. I’m struggling with what to do because I’m “gifting” my bridesmaids their hair & makeup for the wedding day, and when I “proposed” to them, I gave them robes to get ready in on the wedding day, a monogrammed makeup bag, and a small candle.


What should I do for the rehearsal dinner? The groomsmen will be getting their gifts then, and so will our two flower girls and ring bearer. I don’t want the bridesmaids to feel left out. They already know I’m gifting the hair and makeup to them at this point.
Wedding is 10/23/21. Should I get them something small? Nothing at all? Any advice is helpful!

18 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on July 24, 2021 at 12:11 PM
  • Vicky
    VIP January 2020
    Vicky ·
    • Flag

    I think you should get them something small that's completely unrelated to your wedding, e.g. a heartfelt note and a gift card to their favorite coffee shop.

    • Reply
  • V
    Champion July 2019
    Veronica ·
    • Flag
    I agree that you should get the something small not related to the wedding. Because it is very nice you are covering hair and makeup I don't necessarily think that's a gift as more of you just making sure they look good on your wedding day.
    • Reply
  • M
    Super June 2021
    Melanie ·
    • Flag
    I would also agree to give them something bit more personalized and not wedding related.
    You also don't have to give out gifts at the rehearsal dinner if you don't want to. We gave ours out in our hotel rooms after dinner so it was a little more personal.
    • Reply
  • A
    Dedicated May 2022
    Amanda ·
    • Flag
    I’m writing letters to my bridesmaids and including a few pictures of us. I think a heartfelt gesture always goes over well.
    • Reply
  • Sara
    Dedicated September 2021
    Sara ·
    • Flag

    I really dislike the whole "shop like it's their birthday" advice when people ask for ideas because it's not their birthday, it's your wedding day. That being said, I would personally write them each a note and maybe gift them a small gift that represents your friendship!

    • Reply
  • SHY
    Master January 2022
    SHY ·
    • Flag

    Def. write them a note. I like the gift card suggestion Vicky gave because it's something they can use for what they want. If they wear jewelry you could do that, or a certificate/group trip to a spa!

    • Reply
  • anna
    Devoted October 2019
    anna ·
    • Flag

    I did handwritten notes to mine and a few small fun gifts!

    • Reply
  • Jacks
    Master September 2019
    Jacks ·
    • Flag

    I don't think hair and makeup for your wedding can be considered a gift for them. It's like saying their bouquets are also a gift. It's something you want for the day.

    I like the idea of spa certificates for them to use whenever they want! Something just for them. I think that's where the "shop like it's their bday" comes from.

    • Reply
  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Yes, to all of this. Gifts should be personalized for the giftee's likes and preferences, or what's the point?

    This is one of the ways "proposal gifts" can backfire. I know it's too late for OP, but for anyone else who is still deciding what to do. It is common in US culture to give a gift of appreciation on or near the wedding day. But if a bride has already spent a lot of money when she asked her attendants, then she doesn't want to spend more later, so we get questions like this.

    • Reply
  • Jacks
    Master September 2019
    Jacks ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Yep agreed.

    • Reply
  • Katie
    Expert August 2021
    Katie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    I agree with this, paying for their hair and makeup and day of robes is nice and all but technically it isn't a gift. Those are things you wanted. I'd give them something personal that has nothing to do with weddings.
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Jessica ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Thanks, but it’s definitely not “too late” for me, nor did I mention that money was an issue because it’s not. Just wanted to see what ideas people had. Thanks for your response!
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    Just Said Yes October 2021
    Jessica ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Love this, thank you!!
    • Reply
  • SHY
    Master January 2022
    SHY ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    You're welcome!!

    • Reply
  • M
    VIP January 2019
    Maggie ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment

    Sorry, I actually only meant "too late" for you in that you can't choose to go back in time to "ungive" those proposal gifts. You can of course choose to give more gifts now if you want.

    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Rockstar October 2022
    Michelle ·
    • Flag
    The proposal is a Pinterest trend. Many of those gifts go in the trash or are donated. They are akin to wedding day props for your pictures: jewelry, robes, pjs, hair/makeup, etc that are not gifts for them. They are taking tons of time and money (and emotional strain at times) to stand up to support you. That is why many suggest skipping the proposal box trend and the jewelry/robes trend in favor of a gift that is suited to their individual interests like you would buy for their birthday with no names/titles engraved.


    But the rehearsal dinner is a great (and traditional) time to give the gifts because they will not be lost and forgotten like they will the morning of the wedding.
    • Reply
  • Judith
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    Gifts given to wear on the day , lol Ike hair and makeup are not gifts for them, they are for you. Now get each of them something personal, like you would for their birthday, and not one for all. It does not have to be expensive, bust a thank you needs to be personal
    • Reply
  • Kari
    Master May 2020
    Kari ·
    • Flag

    I agree with the previous posters who said that paying for your bridesmaids hair and makeup for your wedding day is not a gift - it is something you want for your wedding day.

    I honestly think it would be fine if you just wanted to give each a thoughtful handwritten note or buy small, personal gifts for each of them. It does not need to be a one size fits all. Giving them something that has nothing to do with your wedding but significant personal connection to them will be much more meaningful.

    My MOH ended up not attending our wedding due to pregnancy, but I gave her a pair of quartz and gold dipped earrings from Etsy as a "thank you" for purchasing her dress (which she ended up returning and never wearing). She had pointed out this expensive quartz barrette when we were shopping and commented that it was beautiful and she'd love to make something like that for her own wedding, so I knew the earrings would be her style. She loves them.

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

WeddingWire celebrates love ...and so does everyone on our site! Learn more

Groups

WeddingWire article topics