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Master October 2020

Gift Opening

Mandi, on January 6, 2020 at 1:51 AM Posted in Community Conversations 0 14

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Ok. Hear me out. I've been in 2 weddings. The first was roughly 25 years ago, and the second was 8 years ago, and I hopped on a plane to Europe roughly 3 hours after it's conclusion.
I've recently been informed of a gift opening. Like the next day, you open gifts and people come over and watch you!?! What fresh heck is this?
I like gifts. Heck, I might even love gifts. Buy sitting in a room of people being watched opening gifts? Well, that sounds like a nightmare.
Fiances aunt already tried to invite herself to this event. But like, can I just not have it?
I feel like hosting a meal seems like a nice gesture. But these people have spent the better part of the last 48 hours with me. They wanna be home hanging out with their families, and recuperating before they head back to their classrooms to teach Monday morning.
Hear me out, Sunday- I have to be back at my venue and have things cleaned up by noon. Me, my yoga pants, messy bun, and previous day's makeup are gonna roll up to do that. Fiance will swing by caterer to pick up leftovers.
Then we heat up some rehearsal dinner spaghetti and garlic cheese bread. Shower and nap. We get up, put on some fresh jammies and open presents together. His mom and dad, my mom and dad. Maybe his grandma. Zero of his siblings.
Is this wrong? Rude?
I just don't want to be watched opening gifts. And on the flip side, I wouldn't want to attend this for anyone else either.
Thoughts?

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14 Comments

Latest activity by Cristy, on January 7, 2020 at 6:14 PM

Master September 2020
Nicole · on January 6, 2020 at 2:08 AM
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Ugh, apparently this is a thing in my FH’s family as well. I’ve conceded to a brunch the following day and will MAYBE open the gifts from the family that attend that event. I also think it’s not something that needs to be done with everyone around and don’t understand why it’s expected. I think your idea sounds just fine.
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Super September 2019
Courtney · on January 6, 2020 at 3:51 AM
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This is not a thing in my family. We opened our gifts (all cards) just the two of us a few days after the wedding. It was important alone time because and I couldn’t have imagined my extended family watching me tear up at some of the lovely cards we got lol. I would just politely say that you plan on opening gifts alone when the wedding craziness is over. I’m not sure how common this tradition is, I’ve never personally heard of it!
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Master July 2019
Hannah · on January 6, 2020 at 5:48 AM
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I have literally never heard of this. That's so bizarre. The bridal shower is over lol. Also, we literally got 1 real gift at the wedding. The rest were cards with checks/cash in them. And I feel like that's the norm (at least by me), so I'm not sure what they would be watching lol.
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Master November 2020
Kristen · on January 6, 2020 at 7:44 AM
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Never heard of this and why would anyone want to do that lol. You don't have you do it so just tell people that you'll have a lot going on the day after the wedding and would not want to add one more event.
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VIP February 2020
Lauren · on January 6, 2020 at 9:07 AM
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I've been in several weddings and have gone to a ton of weddings. I hadn't heard of this until my old roommate got married last year. She only opened the presents with her immediate family the next day, though. I thought it was a cool idea so we'll be doing it with mine & FH's immediate family but aren't planning on having a ton of people there for it. We're getting married 10 minutes from FH's hometown, which is an hour and a half away from where we live. We're staying in the area after the wedding and won't be leaving until 2 days after the wedding for the honeymoon so we thought it'd be something cool to do before we drove back home to fly out for our honeymoon. It's definitely not mandatory, though!
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VIP September 2020
Kelsey · on January 6, 2020 at 9:10 AM
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Every wedding I have been in or attended has a gift opening the next day. We will be doing the same thing and hosting a breakfast the next morning. I don't expect everyone to attend but I know some family members and friends will be there. It will be nice since we don't see my FH's family much and this will give us a chance to see them before they go back home to there state. I am taking the Monday after the wedding off to recuperate.
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Master October 2020
Mandi · on January 6, 2020 at 9:11 AM
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I see that a lot on here. But I've only ever seen that happen at one wedding. We're hoping for a similar outcome, but we will see. One of the day of coordinators had an add on where she would pack all our gifts into our vehicle at the end of the night. That'd be a waste of money if we didn't recieve any gifts.
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Expert August 2020
Jodie · on January 6, 2020 at 11:38 AM
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Are you from the Midwest? lol That's a thing here in Wisconsin....or at least it used to be. I've been to tons of weddings around here over the years that typically have a gift opening brunch the next day with the parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts/uncles, other special people... I'm declining to open my gifts in front of anyone but my FH and our dogs and cats...I will have had enough peopling by the end of my wedding night and want to just enjoy quiet time with my hubby at that point.
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Master October 2020
Mandi · on January 6, 2020 at 12:51 PM
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Ha. Yes. Illinois.

And yes. Exactly.
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Super March 2020
Jennifer · on January 6, 2020 at 1:24 PM
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I'm from Indiana and I have never heard of this, nor would I want to participate either. I feel like the bridal shower is reserved for this! So with that said, I don't think you HAVE to do this.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on January 6, 2020 at 4:41 PM
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I've never heard of this event? I'd be weirded out to do that. The next day my husband and I just wanted to go home & relax (we left the day after for our honeymoon).
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Master October 2020
Mandi · on January 6, 2020 at 4:46 PM
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I'm weirded out by it too! I know I had some little cousins who were ring bearers and attended something like this for their parents friends. Poor kids!
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Master May 2021
Cristy · on January 7, 2020 at 6:07 PM
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This is a thing, but not immediately after the wedding. I've always seen it done a few weeks after the wedding, when everything dies down, people are back to their normal lives, and the newlywed couple is back from their honeymoon. Of course, not all couples take a honeymoon right after the wedding, but you get what I mean. Also, I've never seen it done as a big "event." You did that already, it was called a wedding. lol Your aunt will have to see the pictures.
But seriously, I've only ever seen the parents of the couple involved in that. Maybe a sibling or two, depending on your family dynamic.
So, if you want to open wedding gifts in front of your family go for it. If you don't like that idea, then skip it. No big.
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Master May 2021
Cristy · on January 7, 2020 at 6:14 PM
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I also think this was more of a thing back in the day when physical gifts were more common. As a child growing up, I attended many weddings with my family. I always remember seeing the gift table, and being in awe at the mountain of presents I saw there. So, I think those gift opening events were more common back then. Nowadays, with honeymoon registries and many people gifting cash, it's a dying tradition.
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