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Dedicated July 2020

Getting ready- with or without bridal party?

Futurewifey, on June 16, 2020 at 2:11 PM Posted in Planning 0 7

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Due to Covid We changed all of our plans to have a backyard wedding at my parents house. The groom lives in a different state so he will be staying with us and we'll be getting ready at the same house which we really don't mind. The ceremony starts at 3pm and we asked the photographer to get here at 1:30pm. Now my groomsmaids and groomsmen (I only have my sister as my MOH) are asking about getting ready with me and pictures before the ceremony. Honestly we have a small house and in total it's a bridal party of 10, mother of the groom, my parents, groom and me=15. We will be extremely uncomfortable here with all of them space wise. Also I'm leaving the next day to move to a different state and I really want those getting ready pictures to be just my family but I feel pressured to include his family in them since they are asking so much about it. How can I approach this? What can I say? My fh doesn't really care he understands where I'm coming from but I still feel bad about having to tell them no. I would love my FMIL to be here but they are all staying together and traveling in the same car and that would mean I would have to host them all. I'm so stressed!!!

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7 Comments

Legend June 2019
Melle · on June 16, 2020 at 2:22 PM
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I would just say there's not really enough space to be able to do that
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Super February 2021
Kerin · on June 16, 2020 at 3:12 PM
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Agree with PP. Unfortunately, there just isn't enough room.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on June 16, 2020 at 3:59 PM
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I would want everyone involved and there for getting ready. Can you expand space into a covered area outside for people to hangout comfortably after they put their outfits on? A friend we had rented a large RV to get ready in with 3 girls because the venue didn't have a bridal suite.
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VIP August 2020
· on June 16, 2020 at 7:14 PM
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If you want advice:
If you really want them there, figuring out where to put them will be worth it. If you invite them because you feel pressured to, you'll resent them for being there. Tell them (or have your FH tell them) that you want the morning of your wedding to be as relaxing as possible, and that there just isn't enough space to be relaxed while everyone gets ready there.

If you want commiseration:
I'm in a similar situation. My mom has been helping my fmil and my bridesmaid (I only have one, plus my brothers) plan my shower so they've all been talking a lot. I decided that I'd rather have everyone get their hair and makeup done before our reception next year when we'll have a photographer for longer, and I was kind of relieved because I'd rather have a quiet morning. My mom and I are still getting our hair and -depending on covid- makeup done this year (I would honestly be okay being alone, but my parents are paying for everything and I'm the only girl so I'm not going to tell my mom she can't come). My fmil said she would come with us and encouraged my bridesmaid (fh's sil) to come too. I found out about this and promptly rejected that plan. My mom is going to tell fmil that I want to "limit the amount of the fuss as much as possible," and that my fmil can just get her hair done by her usual person. It's not ideal because I'm sure it will annoy my fmil but I know I won't enjoy the day as much if I'm stressed out by having extra people around all morning.
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Dedicated July 2020
Futurewifey · on June 16, 2020 at 9:55 PM
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Yeah I should just be straightforward with them, thank you!!
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Dedicated July 2020
Futurewifey · on June 16, 2020 at 10:05 PM
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Yeah, honestly I'm pretty sure I just want to spend that last day stress free with my parents before I leave. I'll just make sure I make the time for pictures with all of them after the ceremony! Thank you so much and I hope your wedding day goes as planned!!
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