Frustrations booking my catholic ceremony at hometown church

Could your mom and dad talk to the father in person? Whoever you spoke to on the phone doesn't seem to be the best person to talk to.

Hi,
I'm Catholic and I totally understand your frustration. This didn't happen to me, but it definitely is upsetting. My fiancé and I are getting married at our home church and both parents are registered parishioners, including us. We are currently attending a new church that we are loving and it might become our home church once we are married, but for now, we are making plans with our registered home church for our wedding. Being a parishioner doesn't mean that you HAVE to go to church every Sunday. We go to church, but we don't attend our registered church every Sunday, but we are still parishioners because we give what we can by tithing. Are you tithing to the church? As long as you are registered and tithing to the church, you meet the requirement of being a parishioner. That lady is crazy! I would call the church again and mention this. You should be able to get married at the church you were raised in.

Dude... call and make an appointment to talk directly to the Pastor. If it's the same crazy lady who schedule appointments and she asks the reason... tell her it's personal. I bet you'll be just fine.

I was having a lot of issues with my church as well... not the same issues, but still. I would most certainly talk to the pastor or the deacon/priest in charge of marriages there, not some woman who works there and thinks she’s important and makes the rules (lol). And if you have any issues with that, go above the church to the arch diocese! You don’t have to be a parishioner to get married in a church. They may really want you to sign up, but they can’t force you. And if anything, I can’t see why you can’t sign up to be one and then just not attend? I’m sure there’s hundreds of people who are technically parishioners but don’t attend. Unfortunately, some churches just make their own rules and they stick because no one said anything. I wish you luck!!

I dont think you are in the wrong at all... shame on that lady for acting like for a church! I would go in person and ask to speak who's her boss and to speak to the priest.

Wow, I'm so sorry that happened to you! Go directly to the priest & explain your situation! Good luck 💜

I do think there is some Canon Law that may make what you are wanting difficult. My understanding is that you must work with your "home parish" for marriage prep including pre-cana. You have to ask for dispensation to marry outside of your home parish.
If this parish has decided that they are not your home parish then they are following Canon Law by declining to marry you without proper dispensation.
Have you been attending a church by your school? I would go to your local parish and start there. Then you can request dispensation.

This explains it a bit better https://canonlawmadeeasy.com/2015/04/09/can-catholics-marry-in-any-parish-church-they-want/

I'm so sorry that happened to you! My parish gave me no trouble at all. Definitely speak to the pastor and then re-explain the situation. If it helps, you can mention that you got your sacraments there (they should be keeping a record of that). They should be able to pull up that documentation from their records. If your parents have a copy of some or all the paperwork, you can bring that in as well. Regardless, unless they are a cathedral or mission (I'm in California), Catholic churches really aren't supposed to turn away Catholics seeking the sacrament of marriage just because of their parishioner status.

Wow, that's horrible of her. I wouldn't want to use that church solely because you'd have to deal with her regularly.
I'm getting married in my childhood Catholic church and haven't gone there in years. I no longer practice my faith but my fiance does- but his church is too small (holds maybe 50 people). So we are using my childhood church- it was a nonissue and we aren't even members... but my fiance's church had to write them a letter of introduction.

I would attempt to have your parents talk to the priest if they know him, as it sounds like you won't get anywhere with the admin, and she probably controls the priest's schedule, so getting a meeting would be difficult. If you are on the parish rolls and tithing, then the parish can't deny you being a parishoner; to be considered a parishoner, you either have to live within the parish boundaries (which, if your legal address is within the parish boundaries, that is an argument in your favor) OR register with the parish. As someone else mentioned previously, if there is a parish you attend while you are in school, you may have to get that priest/administration involved for pre-cana.