Friend's Wedding

I think if he’s texted you, chances are your invitation got lost in the post and he’s chasing RSVPs! I would text back saying “We’d love to attend, however just wanted to check whether you’re OK with us bringing daughter? If not we understand however in that case it’ll just be me as husband will stay home with her. Thanks!” Or whatever the case is. I’d be totally fine to get that message.

I would echo what KiwiDerbyBride said, and I would probably add that you haven't yet received an invitation, but you're looking forward to the invitation and the wedding. Since the wedding isn't until the fall, i wonder when the RSVP date actually is. Perhaps ask for the invitation/wedding info, even if he just texts you a pic of an invite? And ask who is included on the invitation / if kids are invited to the wedding or not, as that will affect the logistics for you guys.

Simply just ask, especially if they are your friend then it shouldn't be a problem and it's definitely not rude.

You can definitely just ask. Nothing rude about that.

Agree with the PPs that you should definitely ask to clarify

Thank you guys! I messaged him and he said they sent us an invitation awhile ago. I haven't yet said anything to him about bringing our daughter. I am worried about putting him in a position where he will feel forced to let us bring her, but at the same time I don't know if they already planned on allowing us to bring her since we never received their invitation.

I would just ask. If they question it you can always say you need to know to get a head's up about childcare. I don't think asking is an issue unless you try and convince them to let you bring her when they say you can't (not saying you would, that's just an example.)

It sounds like you have a newborn? Am I reading that correctly? You were still pregnant at the time the original invites went out a year ago, so your daughter must still be quite young?

I would just ask. You're a mom with an infant. If they are taken aback that you are asking if your infant is welcome, then I would question if all their marbles are there. I think that would be a pretty typical question from parents of infants.

To further explain, they sent out save the dates in the fall of 2019 and it was addressed to my husband and I. Their wedding was supposed to be June 2020, but because of Covid, they pushed it back until October 2020. Things still hadn't improved so they pushed it back until September 2021. All of the changes were communicated to me via text message. I wasn't pregnant when the save the date was mailed out, but I have since been pregnant and had our daughter. She is currently two months old and will be almost five months at the time of their larger celebration. They have mentioned wanting to meet her, but no mention of when. I don't want to make them feel like I am forcing them to include her if they don't want to which is why I am hesitant to ask.

I've had several guests ask about bringing kids, and while the answer is no, I genuinely appreciate them asking over just bringing their child with them.