For those who are being married by a friend-ceremony question

Read from the CA state website...

Tons of stuff on the license, but the only real thing is we have to say "i do"

yea for legalize...

I will follow this, because a friend will marry us and we're in CA as well. We haven't gone into details yet, so I'm no help to you

We didn't have them say it, cuz we find it cheezy, but technically, by becoming licensed in the state to do it, they have had the authority vested in them by the state.

If a friend is doing it, if they are being deputized for a day, the county will tell them what they have to do...

@ Corinne So what I found online, for california is these are the requirements:

http://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displayText.xhtml?lawCode=FAM&division=3.&title=&part=3.&chapter=2.&article=

We are being married by a friend who got online ordainment, not deputized by the state because a) it takes longer than the 30 seconds it does to become an online minister and b) it costs more than it does to become an online minister and c) CA doesn't care.

They talk about the requirements of who they are (judge, minister, ect), that both parties have to declare in front of the minister they want to become married (i.e. the I do part). That and they have to inspect the license before the ceremony. It also talks about how they have to fill in certain boxes and return it within 10 days. Nothing more about what to say during the actual ceremony.

Hope that helps!

No "by the authority vested in me" lingo for us; we're having ours just "introduce us" as Mr. and Mrs. after we kiss.

"We are being married by a friend who got online ordainment, not deputized by the state because a) it takes longer than the 30 seconds it does to become an online minister and b) it costs more than it does to become an online minister..."

At least the State of Florida requires an online course, an online test, and an affidavit of character to become a Notary Public and then provides a sample ceremony so couples don't have to ask what can my newly-'ordained' friend/relative say at our ceremony!

This is why you hire a pro. Sorry. I"ve never said that in over 1500 weddings.

Every state is different.

Can I pop in with a question? We have a friend marrying us as well, he officiated his brother's wedding and I guess his "license" is still good and valid here in my state. He's my FH's best friend and I think we're all glad he can do it. Question: What expense is involved for him with this licenses and stuff? I plan on buying he & his wife a nice gift & paying for their their hotel room. Should there be something else I offer to pay for? @Celia

I asked my officiant this today (she's a JOP in VT) and she said as long as the paperwork is in order basically all you HAVE to say is declare your intent, then she declares it done. Then sign. Done.

What you say, how, phrasing, doesn't matter a bit. What she is signing off on is that we both willingly consented, voiced our intent, and she acknowledged the contract. The binding bit is *actually* the marriage license, which she fills out and mails in, stating we/she did those things. All the flowery language is for us / our family / our guests. We could say "Do you take her?" I do "Do you take him?" I do "You are married." Sign here. and it would be legal... at least in Vermont... We tend to run a little loosey goosey here through.

Aw, I kind of like the "by the power vested in me" line, but then I go in for traditional sounding stuff. The only things I refuse to have said in our ceremony is "who gives this woman away" and all the old school "promise to obey" stuff.

I realize that, but plenty of other things fit; favors, expensive shoes, limos, photo booths.......and 200 guests.

I'm booked on your date, VM, but boy, I can't wait to marry my nontraditional couples this year!!

KD, (cute dog) he should confirm his legality in your state.

He has no expense for your license; it's all on you. I think you're fine.

@Celia any crazy/weird NJ things I need to know about? We are having my FHs cousin marry us (online ordainment) and while I haven't found anything online thus far, I don't want a weird surprise when we send in the license. Thanks!