For Those Getting Married For The Second Time Around..

Yes, the first time I got married at the JP. Which there is nothing wrong with that however, I wasn't what I wanted. We didn't tell anyone and I didn't even dress up. I don't even have one single photo.

This time we are doing a full wedding ceremony/reception the whole nine yards. But things are so different this go round than last time.

About the wedding, or about the marriage?

With regard to the wedding, I wanted a smaller one this time. Actually, I wanted a smaller one the first time, too, but the groom wanted to invite everyone up to and including his second cousins. This time around, we ended up with only a dozen guests.

I also wanted to have an evening party with dancing. The first time around, the groom was hard of hearing, and music would have impaired his ability to hear conversation. Plus, because Jewish weddings can't be on a Saturday, we had a wedding early enough in the day that people could travel home afterward. This time, the wedding was still during the day, but I got my evening party at our at-home reception three days later.

With regard to the marriage, I wanted to remember to marry someone who was actually in love with me. The first time, I was so in love with him, I was happy when he agreed to marry me. Somehow, I never got around to making sure he was in love with me, too.

Oh well, if we are talking marriage (I think I misread) I think it's more so I am older, a little wiser, much more patience and I am really in love with my FH. I think with my first we got married because we both felt it was "the right thing to do" I was really young and we didn't know really know what a good marriage was. While I did love him he wasn't my soul mate and I don't love him like I love FH. I have learned a lot over the years and feel I have more knowledge now to be more successful.

Wedding - way different and the not at all. No Catholic ceremony this time around just a judge (still not sure how I feel about that) way way more money being spent on this one.

Marriage- I don't know this FH isn't going to die on me (hopefully)

My 1st wedding was at the JOP as well and from what I was told I didn't look happy in the pictures and I wasn't. All the signs were there for me to head for the hills but I was naive and figured things would change. Honestly I don't think I loved him or liked him for that matter. Maybe I was whipped lol. My relationship with FH is completely different I am head over hills this time and the fact that we've been bff's years before we got together makes it that much better. I could care less if we were married at Mc Donalds with a Ronald Mc Donald sheet cake as long as I get to spend the rest of my life with the man I should've married the first time.

Well my first marriage ended with my psycho ex husband kidnapping (literally police reports, missing child alert, etc) our 7 month old so let's just say EVERYTHING is different this time.

There's more focus on the ceremony itself this time.

We have slightly fewer people on the guest list this time. I'm spending a lot less on photography. I really scaled back this time.

I'd be hard pressed to pick out the couples I marry that include one or two 'pre-married" partners (I think I like that term! better than divorced!) They do what they want and what suits their style.

I do think they are more relaxed about the 'perfection factor' though. With one or both of them having the experience, they realize that it's not about the color of the favor ribbon or the cute signs in the photos, it's about the overall feeling of the day and the fact, of course, that they'll be married to the person they love at the end of it.

Well, this time around I don't have that gnawing feeling that I'm making a mistake, which is a plus.

The wedding itself costs less this time around too. No veil, cheaper wedding rings (from etsy!), no monogrammed napkins, no cookie table, no apps, not in a 'traditional' reception venue, cheaper photography, no DJ, less guests (partly by choice, partly because people can't/don't want to come)....