FOB toast?

I feel like those who host the party should give the welcome.

Fair, but it's further complicated by the fact that my parents originally wanted to host, but said a bunch of nasty things to both me and FH, and said they would only pay if we followed their extremely long list of "requirements" (including signing a prenup).

We said no thanks. So, we're hosting. But it's not because they didn't offer.

Mom's already upset because we "took away" her chance to plan a wedding, so she feels we purposely excluded her. (I don't think they deserve to host the wedding, TBH.)

I think if you're comfortable with it (or in this case, feel it's necessary) it's fine if a parent makes a toast even if they didn't host the wedding. I feel nowadays, since more people host their own weddings, it's more of an honor that the parents get vs who paid, if that makes sense?

Edit: Eek , that makes it more complicated. I would set some guidelines and ask them if they'd like to make a toast if you think it's necessary to keep the peace but maybe you guys make a little thank you that makes it clear you're hosting if you think it's necessary to clarify.

Right. We barely spoke to them for 9 months, though, based on what they said to both of us. They swear that they support our relationship and that they're really, really, sorry, but it sort of feels disingenuous. So, I'm not sure they "deserve" the honor. I'm really not comfortable with it, but our relationship with them is so tenuous right now.

He's walking me down the aisle. I haven't discussed father daughter dance, but I'm not sold on that. FH wants to do one with his mom, though, so I might just suck it up so no one gets upset.

My father is not allowed to make a toast at the wedding. mom and dad divorced a year ago and I don't trust him. just best man, matron and groom

SeattleBride, how did you handle that? I'm not sure what I want. Was there backlash?

I'm debating just avoiding the situation by not asking. Maybe I'll agree to it if he asks me, although I'll question why he even wants to do it. I don't think he'd be presumptuous enough to assume. Maybe I"m just stressing out over nothing.

How is your relationship with your DJ? If dad gets carried away the dj can always play music over him and take the mic away, there were issues before my sisters wedding and my dad did not end up getting a toast, the issue is resolved themselves over time and now it is something that my sister regrets. The thing about adults are they are less likely to show their @$$ when people are watching...

We are paying for 95% of our wedding, but we will ask my dad if he wants to give a toast. My mom has said multiple times that they feel sorry that they can't afford to pay for the wedding, so I don't want to take that away from them. However, your situation is different! I honestly don't know what I would do if I were you. I think I would just not have any parent toasts. I know you didn't ask about this, but I think I would do a father daughter dance since your FH is dancing with your mom, but maybe have your DJ shorten the song to 2 minutes max.

I would give him the option so he doesnt feel put on the spot ya never know he could say no!

Do not give him the opportunity to speak with all of your guests attention if you don't feel 100% confident in it. You don't need the added stress. Your mom will get over it...but you cant take it back if you allow it. Just my opinion of course without knowing much detail.