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Expert June 2020

fmil Makes Me Nervous

Emly, on August 16, 2019 at 10:44 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 3

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I'm not so much looking for advice as I am just to rant to people who understand So its wedding season in my family and we are booked solid for weddings for the next 4 weekends. The last one is an old friend of my FH and his family is invited as well. Their RSVPs were due about a month ago and they opted to do a plated meal (in my area this isn't really common), anyway I feel like RSVPing to a plated meal wedding is much more imperative than a buffet meal for obvious reasons. Well we were talking to FMIL the other day and she goes "Yeah, I'm not sure if were going to her wedding or not yet. there is just so much going on so we will have to see how we are feeling that day." ....Um excuse me what??... Look, I'm pretty laid back but this seems super rude to me.

This got me thinking of all the other things FMIL has said regarding weddings and just gave me a wave of anxiety for our wedding. She just seems to think that its not a big deal if more people come to the wedding uninvited and it doesn't matter if someone RSVPs or not. In fact FH aunt is getting married tomorrow and she was having trouble getting peoples RSVPs back, so like you do she began to contact people. Well FMIL found this profoundly rude and went on and on about how its just tacky to call people regarding their RSVP.. but like its kinda nice to know how many people are coming, right?...

I guess I'm just worried that FHs family all think like FMIL as much as I am pretty easy going I'm also a crazy planner and I like to know what is going on, but I'm pretty sure thats common for people planning such a big event LOL. IDK guys, I guess just pray for me

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3 Comments

Latest activity by Cher Horowitz, on August 16, 2019 at 1:43 PM

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Jennifer · on August 16, 2019 at 11:04 AM
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Yeah your FMIL is what we would call a rude guest haha! I can't believe she would say that! I don't think you'll have too much to worry about for your wedding, just make sure FH is aware of what she said about inviting uninvited guests and to keep her on lockdown about this!
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Master June 2019
Danielle · on August 16, 2019 at 11:08 AM
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You are definitely right. Unfortunately, I think the majority of people truly don't think about these things when it comes to weddings. I know I didn't until I planned my own. Shoot, at my wedding we had half the list RSVP by the deadline, and we had to do follow up calls to get the remaining 100 or so. AND we ended up with roughly 36 no shows at our wedding......talk about annoying. Thinking about the people I could of invited instead and all of the money wasted...ugh, but nothing I can do about it. We still enjoyed our day with everyone that did take the time to be there. We ended up having around 140 guests, so that is a decent amount. Still, I could of saved quite a bit of money and arranged things differently.
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Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on August 16, 2019 at 1:43 PM
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How ironic FMIL called FH's aunt rude. FMIL needs to look at herself first
In all seriousness, I would talk to FH and be open about your concerns regarding his mom. I really hope boundaries can be established so everything goes smoothly!
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