fmil and First Look

My suggestion would be to make sure you and your FH are on the same page, have him be firm with his mother about it, and if you have a second shooter or a DOC they can run point to make sure no one ruins that moment. Our DOC will be standing watch to make sure that no one but our photographer is allowed anywhere near where our first look is taking place.

Tell her that’s the whole point, to not have all eyes on you and get a genuine first reaction instead of feeling forced or like you need to react a certain way.

I agree with just making sure you and FH are on the same page about this. I hope you don't end up with any drama. This just made me realize my mother might feel the same way and I'm going to have to tell her the same thing, haha! Buy luckily she's been pretty awesome about all of our decisions so far.

I would have your fiance explain to his mother the special moment for bride & groom and how other people aren't involved.

Yeah, just tell her no. That's a definite dealbreaker.

Have you FH tell her first look is only ten minutes she can be present during family photos and this is an intimate moment btwn the two of you!

From my experience, family members started coming out half way through our first look.

So maybe compromise and say the last half of the first look she can be present.

Yeah, that's a hard no. It's supposed to be a private moment between you and him. Any way you can do it offsite and keep the location a secret? That's what we are doing. My mom is getting ready (hair and makeup) with the me and the girls, then going home while we take pictures offsite.

Agree with all PP! An option you could offer FMIL would be a first look with FH after you. Similar to a dad and bride first look. Then that can slide into family photos.

Good luck!

I’d have to say no. It’s not about her, it’s about the two of you. I get that you don’t want to hurt her feelings, but why are hers any more important that yours? She should be thinking of what you want, as it is your wedding.

The whole point of the first look is for it to be just the two of you. She’s being dramatic. Your fiancé should tell her what the deal is. Stand your ground! It’s about the two of you, not everyone else

Yea I agree with PPs - you can do a separate first look with them after your own

I went through this with my mom.. she wasn’t familiar with the concept behind a first look and it being just for us. When I mentioned that during the first look she can finish getting ready she was confused and I had to gently explain that FH and I wanted that moment to be about us. She was accepting of it once she knew where I was coming from. Make sure your FH is on the same page as you and maybe have him explain to his mom that you two want to share that special moment without family looking on and leave it at that.

We aren't doing a first look but if we were this would be my FMIL.... she has no daughters only a son (my FH obv.) and she has been trying to be involved in everything. She tried giving me her old garter... she was offended when my mother bought FH and I "Mr &Mrs." champagne glasses...

Its not stepping on toes though. I would just explain the photographer is there to capture the moment without any outside influences so y'all can share these moments later with them. Its a special moment with you guys and she has to understand that.