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Melissa
Just Said Yes October 2019

Flower girl matching fmil instead of bridal party?

Melissa, on July 28, 2019 at 12:32 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 13
So FMIL has decided that my future sister-in-law needs to be in the wedding as a flower girl. I welcome her being a part of the wedding party but the dress that FMIL already bought is navy blue (apparently it was bought months ago, but she “forgot” to tell us and now it’s not returnable). She thinks that the flower girl should match her dress and my FH since they’re family. My dress is ivory and my bridesmaids are in shades of wine (from dark blush to dark burgundy). The guys will be in navy blue suits and the flowers are blush, burgundy, and ivory with blue thistle.

My question is: is it odd for the flower girl to wear blue when the rest of the women walking down the aisle are in pinks/burgundies?

13 Comments

Latest activity by Sinéad, on September 26, 2019 at 9:40 AM
  • Rachael
    Expert October 2019
    Rachael ·
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    I personally wouldn't be happy about getting pushed into that decision, though I think it would look fine. I'd say if you are having a ring barer maybe he could have a wine color on him?? I think that would actually be gorgeous, and the color flop will give just a little bit of pop to it all

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  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
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    Since the guys are in navy, I think your FMIL & flower girl in navy would be lovely! But I’d be ticked FMIL not only demanded your FSIL be in the wedding but wear something she went ahead and bought. Up to you but if me, if my FH really wanted his sister as a flower girl I’d at least tell FMIL that’s fine but she needs to wear the color (pink or burgundy) I want for my wedding party. I’d even chose a few dresses FMIL can choose from.
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  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
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    It's abrasive she did that to you, you're handling this graciously. I think it'll look fine, you can give her a burgundy flower crown if you want to encorporate it.
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  • Colleen
    Master September 2019
    Colleen ·
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    If the guys are in navy I think it will look ok. I agree a burgundy flower crown will be perfect.
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  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
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    I think navy will look fine, but I wouldn’t be happy about her forcing it.
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  • Mandi
    Master October 2020
    Mandi ·
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    I think it will be fine.
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  • Cher Horowitz
    Master December 2019
    Cher Horowitz ·
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    I don't think the color palette will be odd, but you have every right to be irked by FMIL!

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  • Melissa
    Just Said Yes October 2019
    Melissa ·
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    Those are great ideas, thanks ladies!
    She’s done so many passive aggressive things that now I think even little things like a mismatched dress are getting to me. I don’t really know how to deal with her personality and back handed actions...From trying on my engagement ring and getting it stuck on her hand to calling the florist to change our flowers to sending out her own set of save the dates after we asked her to limit her guest list to 60 (she’s invited 148 ppl that we know of now), she’s making me a little crazy. My FH has sat her down 4x to explain it’s not her wedding so it’s not like she doesn’t know what she’s doing (and she cried once saying she felt left out since we said no her ideas — like the balloons she wanted to tie up on the ceiling for decoration). We’re going for a classic wedding in an old 1920s historic building and she’s going for an 80s prom/Mamma Mia musical theme.
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  • Destiny
    VIP May 2020
    Destiny ·
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    I personally think the flower got girl is supposed to match the bride. ...
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  • L
    Beginner October 2020
    Lexi ·
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    It will probably all match and look intentional to your guests especially if you have her wear a burgundy crown and throw burgundy petals! However if you don't like the look or the shades don’t fit well, then I wouldn’t feel bad for even a second to try for a different dress. Especially if she’s running away with everything! Don’t feel bad about standing your ground on your day
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  • A
    Expert January 2020
    Abby ·
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    You are handling things so well. I wouldve lost my mind. I thought my FMIL was being a little much. You are a saint for dealing with all that. My FH and I had to have a sit down and say hey. Stop this or you’re not coming to the wedding. Yes that’s harsh and yes we meant it, but we hit our limit. So maybe that’s what you need to do. Instead of going about it saying it’s not you’re wedding say you won’t be attending if you don’t stop your actions.
    Good luck with everything it all sounds beautiful!
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  • L
    Lady ·
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    Navy will look great with that color scheme. Your FG will be in like 2 pictures - this is not worth fighting about.

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  • Sinéad
    WeddingWire Administrator January 2025
    Sinéad ·
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    Hey Melissa!! Have you decided to have your flower girl wear the blue dress?

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