flower girl issues

If you are that worried, I would not! I had a flower girl but no kids at reception. Looking back, I wished I would not have had a flower girl or ring bearer. Seemed silly to get them all dressed up for the ceremony, then to the sitter. And then I realized they cannot throw flowers or carry the ring... so basically it's a show of how cute kids can be....

Basically, I wouldn't find a FG just to have one...

You can't not invite a person to your reception, no matter how old, when you have asked them to a part of the ceremony. Kids are not props. Just skip it.

She is important in my life. She is the first great grandchild in my family. I do love her, but she has a bratty side to her and her mother can be uh bratty as well. I love her father though. Her grandmother is throwing my bridal shower (my aunt). I just don't know if she would behave.. Although I know the 11 year old would NOT put up with her as the 11 year old acts like she's 18 (grew up too quickly). I just don't know what to do...

We decided against having either a flower girl or ring bearer. I have a lot of cousins with younger children, and would feel obligated to have them all, but I know it would be too much lol. My niece will

Be 11-12 by the rim we get married so she'll be too old. Skip

The 3 yr old.

I would just skip it.

Also, I already asked the 11 year old. I love her and would make her my bridesmaid if she were older (so she's a junior bridesmaid). The 11 year old is so well behaved that she doesn't put up with anyone's drama. Also the 11 year old has been in a wedding before so she knows what to do - the 3 year old has never been in a wedding...

Nope. Even my DIL decided my granddaughter wasn't ready to deal with being in their wedding at age 3 and she is a caring wonderful mom who doesn't let GD act like a wild child. She just knew her daughter well enough that the attention span and ability to handle the role just wasn't there yet. It's not a fault just a case of maturity and we sure don't want to push the little one beyond her limits, that would be a disaster in the making.

Just skip it. A three year old will not remember the day .

I was just at a wedding that had a flower girl and ring bearer. They were both running around during the entire ceremony and lifting up mom's (the MOH) dress. It was incredibly distracting, and even though the mother is super great about discipline, there's not much you can do in the middle of a ceremony if a child decides to act up.

I would say don't include the 3 year old. I don't really get the flower girl/ring bearer thing. When I see them at weddings they are always stressed out and usually crying. You can't make sure little kids don't cry when you're forcing them to perform in front of a crowd. Their parents can't prevent it either.

I love kids and invited lots to my wedding, they were fine, but we didn't give them any responsibilities.

Not sure why you keep bringing up the 11 year old putting the 3 year old in her place. Is that the plan? 11 year old junior bridesmaid keeps 3 year old flower girl in check at the wedding???

As for adding the 3 year old, sounds like you are waaay more concerned about her upstaging your day with her (possible bad) behavior. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised as a guest if a 3 year old doesn't cooperate. It wouldn't show as a reflection of you or poor planning. It's just what some kids do. Just leave her out of it and not have to worry about her on the day.

My 3 year old niece will be the flower girl. She's a boss and it's 50/50 if she cooperate on the day of. But guess what, I want her to be a part of it because I love her (and she's sooo freakin cute!) Added a pic since that's the new thing now with adding comments lol.

I think I will just stick with the 11 (and 8) year old. We have a ring bearer who is extremely well behaved. He's 8 years old and has been a ring bearer before. Their family is "prim and proper" so they would NOT let them act up. I would make the 11 year old my bridesmaid if she were older! I'm closer to her than I am my own cousins!

She can be very quiet. Like last night we had a mini engagement party and she was sitting on the couch reading a large book. When I asked her, her eyes lit up. I think she's excited to go dress shopping now, haha! The little boy rarely talks either. I have also only ever seen them fight once and it was about who got the controller for the video game they were playing. They wouldn't need a kids meal either, they eat meat like adults...

Also, I work with family. I know how they act. I love them a lot, but when you work with family - they fight. I was saying the 11 year old would put her in her place because she won't put up with fighting. She is bossy, but sweet. She acts like an 18 year old. I see my family every day of the week and even on holidays. I have a LARGE family too. Therefore, my bosses and my coworkers will all be at my wedding (since they are family). We are close, but we have our arguments. We are having a wedding of 250+ guests, Max 290. His family is so small, but I am closer to his little cousins than some of mine, but the 3 year old I love. We just have family drama, more than others since we work together.

Just skip it. That's going to be so much stress!! No one on earth will miss you not having a having a flower girl

My twin daughters were flower girls at 3 years old and at 4 years old. Here's what kept them quiet and calm during the ceremony and reception (because they have to be included in both)

Lollipops. After they came down the aisle, my mom was at the ready to plug their mouths. This will be happening at my wedding as well.

At my cousin's wedding, one of the GM gave the RB candy to eat throughout the ceremony to keep him there and happy.

If she won't be allowed at the reception she shouldn't be at any of it, she is a child not a prop. You wouldn't invite an adult to just the ceremony and tell them to leave before the reception.

Skip it

The 11 year old shouldn't have to be a baby sitter

Can the 11 year old go down the aisle with a flower ball and not throw petals? Maybe that will make her stand out and be cute!

We skipped the flower girl and ring bearer. I would have the 11 year old be in the wedding and skip the 3 year old. You don't need that stress. Invite to the wedding but not as a flower girl.