First look?

I am super conflicted for the same points!

We are because I have anxiety and I want that to be private between us. Also we are having a 6pm ceremony and we want the best light for outdoor pictures by doing them before the ceremony.

We are. This is my 2nd time down the aisle and I remember how very little time I actually had with my ex on our wedding day. I know I’ll treasure our first look time.

FH and I are dead set on not doing a first look. People say doing one doesn't take away from the experience.
I beg to differ. We want our first looks to be genuine when walking down the aisle.

We are to have that time together just us & because everyone says you're wedding day flys by so we want to enjoy as much time as we can!

View Quoted Comment This is how we feel too, I feel like it would take the emotion away from our ceremony since we would have seen each other for a few hours before hand. I think I need to stick to my original plan and not second guess it.

We were with each other the whole day. Our time together took no emotion away from our walk down the aisle together to the altar. We still were excited, nervous, and had an emotional ceremony.
Our reasons for a first look, and getting all photos done before the ceremony was because we had a small wedding, and wanted to spend time with our families and friends at the cocktail hour. Photos took almost 3 hours before the ceremony. I didn't see how it would have been feasible after the ceremony taking photos in the evening, and wrangling small kids, 2 with Down syndrome, instead of getting them fed.

And our first look together was genuine as our photographer captured the moments we got ready together. My H placed the veil in my hair, helped me with my necklace and shoes, I helped with his coat, cufflinks and pocket square. All those moments were genuine.

Our walk smiling happily down the aisle together to the altar was genuine and happy.

Well I thought the first look can be done before the picture.

I am extremely quite and shy so I wanna do a first look and have that moment with just us (and the photographer in the distance). Also an extra thing we are doing ... I want to tie his bow tie for the wedding (weird I know) but it's something I enjoy doing on Sundays before worship.

We aren't doing a first look. We had a tumultuous dating relationship where it was really secret, so we want to share that "first look" with everyone.

The benefits of having a first look is that you get a nice, calming moment with your fiance and the big logistics benefit is more photos. I, however, will be a nervous wreck no matter what, and I know that I'll have too many other things going on in my head. Knowing my fiance, I'll just make him more nervous! Haha. We are also having a cocktail hour and doing most photos that can be done separate, beforehand.

My FH and I decided to do a first look on our big day. First and foremost we want that special moment to ourselves. Not to mention it's a wonderful photo opportunity. Then we can get our pictures done before the ceremony and not have to worry about it after. Logistically it makes the most sense for us.

I wasn’t sure I wanted a first look because I wanted that tradition of not seeing each other until I walk down the aisle. I’m now leaning toward a first look for a few reasons. Everyone is traveling for the wedding (including myself) and I want to make sure I spend time with everyone. I’m a fat kid at heart and don’t want to miss out on the food at my cocktail hour. I also feel that pictures take longer than you think (just judging from FBIL’s recent wedding) and saying I only want 30-45 minutes for pictures might be unrealistic.

We did a first look. Loved it. we got to spend some quiet time with our photographer and videographer taking the pictures we wanted and talking about how excited we are. It took no emotion out of the ceremony. Actually, in the ceremony, I could mostly see a ton of the guests and I didn't see him until about halfway down the aisle.

Also, after the ceremony, we took a party bus with our bridal party on the way to the reception and just relaxed and partied it up. We didn't have a cocktail hour so we just walked into the reception and spent time with people.

View Quoted Comment

I really don't get this argument, but I see it all the time- if you see your FH beforehand, your ceremony won't be special.

To me, the emotional part of the ceremony is saying your vows and committing yourself to each other. What's special is the acts of vowing, exchanging rings, etc. Seeing each other before in no way takes away from those moments. If anything, it calms your jitters and allows you to be more present in those moments.

There are so many pros to doing one, but the idea of seeing FH before the ceremony is just a dealbreaker for me. I’ve hyped up the dramatic walking down the aisle and him seeing me for the first time there and crying thing all my life 😂

But if that hasn’t been ingrained in you, I’d say do it. There are no cons aside from that. My photographers love first looks and definitely lean towards them, but they also have a photography timeline for if you don’t want them.

I've been pretty conflicted as well but finally settled on doing them beforehand. I'd just love the extra time with the guests

View Quoted Comment It's great that you felt genuine in your photos doing a first look, I wasn't saying you CAN'T feel that way. It's just my (possible) unpopular opinion on this topic.
FH wants to see me for the first time walking down the aisle, and same with me seeing him as I walk. I feel if we saw each other beforehand, we wouldn't feel as...breath taken (?) when the actual ceremony rolls around. Not saying it wouldn't still be emotional and exciting, but I feel it wouldn't be the same feeling for us than with other people.

Again, just my personal opinion. You wanna do it or did it? Great!

View Quoted Comment The traditional “first look” being during the ceremony is really socialized in a lot of people. I have no qualms with first looks and totally see the pros. For me personally, the intimacy of a first look (a pro for many) is actually a con, as I find it kinda anticlimactic. I’d much rather share that moment with my family and friends.

We are not doing a first look. We decided that the moment that we see each other will be before all of our guest. We thought about doing a first look and realized that it was not for us. We want that magical feeling of seeing each in a dramatic way.