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Mallory
Beginner June 2016

First Look Thoughts??

Mallory, on August 5, 2015 at 7:43 AM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 35

Hey Ladies! I've been having mixed feelings back and forth after talking with my photographer on whether I should do the first look. I'm a little old-fashion and want to wait until walking down the aisle but at the same time we will be missing spending time with friends/family at cocktail hour. Can anyone give me their perspective if you did first look or feelings on either? ThanksSmiley smile

35 Comments

Latest activity by Danielle G, on August 5, 2015 at 8:44 PM
  • Laura Marie
    VIP September 2015
    Laura Marie ·
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    We aren't doing it. I'm not opposed to it, but that moment where I lock eyes with my FH walking down the aisle is something I've dreamed about forever, and he feels the same way. So even though it's a fleeting second that sort of messes up our entire schedule, I think it will be worth it.

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  • Jersey
    Master November 2016
    Jersey ·
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    I'm doing a first look and I can't wait!! We will be able to see each other for the first time in a more intimate setting. We will also be able to get photos taken before the ceremony so we can enjoy cocktail hour. And from what everyone has told me.. It won't take away from walking down the aisle, that will still be a romantic experience.

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  • Kelli
    Master September 2015
    Kelli ·
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    We are doing first look because we want that private moment together. I am sure we will both be just as emotional when I walk down the aisle because in moments we will be married!! We also aren't having a very long reception so want to spend as much time as possible with our guests.

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  • FMM
    Master January 2016
    FMM ·
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    We are, here is a list of why:

    1. We are getting married in winter, limited light

    2. I have anxiety and don't like a ton of people looking at me...I want that first moment to be genuine, and private.

    3. after the ceremony there will be very little time for FH and I to be alone.

    4. I want to be able to touch him, kiss him, hug him when we first see each other..if we waited that wouldn't be possible at the end of aisle.

    5. If we wait, when I get to him the ceremony will start, we won't have any time to appreciate one another...the focus will be switched quickly.

    6. It's the best decision for us.

    7. More time with guests without feeling rushed.

    8. Seeing him before the ceremony won't take away from the amazing moment when I walk towards him down the aisle, because that walk will still symbolize my last walk as a "single" lady...it's special in it's own way. First look (to us) means 2 amazing special moments to be caught on camera Smiley smile

    I'm sure there are a ton of pro's for waiting, but they don't out weigh the pro's for a first look (for us).

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  • Mrs. Nicole
    Master May 2016
    Mrs. Nicole ·
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    We're not doing a first look, but we are doing a lot of pictures before hand separately to save time so we can have that private moment for pictures between the ceremony and reception.

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  • E
    Master July 2015
    Emma ·
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    It was the best idea EVER!! We got a moment to just us. We both got to take everything in together. I got to hug and kiss him. We got a ton of pictures out of the way. It made the ceremony even better because we weren't as nervous.

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  • Reese
    Master July 2015
    Reese ·
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    As others have said we did a first look so we could have a moment together to experience seeing each other. I wanted to be able to hug him and talk to him, neither of which being possible at the altar. It really is a personal choice, but I'm so glad we did it.

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  • Kelli
    Master September 2015
    Kelli ·
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    What FMM said !!! All that I am thinking!

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  • Jennifer
    VIP July 2016
    Jennifer ·
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    We won't be doing first look, there's a moment of magic that happens when you see him, and he see's you, that first time at the end of the aisle. I don't think we're planning on doing much for pics either. Haven't really talked about it yet.

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  • Jersey
    Master November 2016
    Jersey ·
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    Just an interesting tidbit... when asked about their wedding, most of my friends said that their first look/time before the ceremony was their favorite part! It's a time to be with your FH... all alone. You don't get a lot of alone and peaceful time on your wedding day. They said it calmed them so much and was their favorite part of the day.

    I can't speak from experience yet but I'm excited to do a first look Smiley smile

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  • Mallory
    Beginner June 2016
    Mallory ·
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    Thanks so much Ladies for the feedback, all very helpful!! Just have to get FH on my side for the first look too haha!

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  • Anastasia
    Devoted April 2016
    Anastasia ·
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    I felt like it was the most practical way to go if photographs are your priority. Photos are a big priority of mine, but my FH basically squashed it. He's had very few strong feelings about anything wedding-connected, and I think that it is sweet that he is so looking forward to that first moment of seeing me come down the aisle as his bride. It makes it even more special to me. So there's no question: no first look for us.

    You should see if your FH has similar feelings...I read several threads about first looks and found many women whose FH (strangely) really looked forward to that aisle moment.

    I know that a lot of people say that the aisle moment is still special even if you have a first look. Nevertheless, if someone feels strongly about seeing you for the first time at the ceremony, it could change how they feel on the day of.

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  • MrsLaurenET
    Master September 2016
    MrsLaurenET ·
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    I definitely wanted to do it. For the photography/cocktail hour reason, but more so because I think I will be super nervous about all those people staring at me, and spending some time with FH ahead of time I think will definitely calm me down.

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  • ALH
    VIP October 2016
    ALH ·
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    Following because I am truly undecided about whether or not to do a first look and FH hasn't expressed a preference either way.

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  • Butterfly
    VIP April 2016
    Butterfly ·
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    I always imagined walking down the aisle as being the first time my groom sees me. Also, that's some people's favorite part of the wedding! I don't want to rob people from that. We will indiually do pictures before the ceremony, and take the remainder after. I personally want to spend cocktail hour taking some pictures, then spending the rest of the time alone or with the bridal party. I want to wind down before walking into the reception. My friend had a first look in 2013, and she and her hubby were bombarded by people during their cocktail hour. I don't want that! I don't want to do a first look just for the convenience of taking pictures. Not enough reason for me. On the other hand, it would calm nerves. I'm not completely saying no to it yet, but leaning towards it. My photographer is really for the first look, as pretty much all of them seem to be these days.

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  • Private User
    VIP August 2014
    Private User ·
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    Yes, definitely do it. It was one of the highlights of our wedding.

    My parents missed their entire cocktail hour, because they didn't.

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  • Melissa847
    Super September 2016
    Melissa847 ·
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    Like others have said, I really want to have his first look be of me walking down the aisle. It's something I've always dreamed of and wanted. But that's just my personal choice and opinion. Do what feels right for you!

    Also I saw some other couples got pictures done during the first look but forgot to wear their rings, so friendly reminder to do that!

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  • Adoretamm
    Master May 2016
    Adoretamm ·
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    We're not doing a first look, but I love the photography that goes with it Smiley smile he'll have his first look at me when I walk down the aisle

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  • Emily O.
    VIP June 2016
    Emily O. ·
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    I can't wait to see his reaction when he sees me walk down the aisle! We are not doing a first look. We are both super traditional, but I was somewhat interested in doing a first look so that we could get all of our pictures done beforehand. FH shot that down quickly. He wants the first time he sees me on our wedding day to be when I'm walking down the aisle. I think it's really sweet! There is a special moment when you lock eyes and people love watching the grooms face when his bride walks down the aisle. I can't wait for that moment! I'm sure brides that don't do a first look will probably tell you that was their favorite part of their wedding day, too. It's really a matter of what you and your FH want and feel. Don't let people try to sway you one way or another on this, it's strictly up to the two of you. Do what's best for you both.

    ETA- I just realized we are date twins! 311 days! Almost to the 200s.

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  • Lara
    Master July 2015
    Lara ·
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    We did it and I have not one regret. We planned it early enough (3pm for a 5pm ceremony) and made sure all immediate family was ready for pictures that we got ALL our formal pictures out of the way before the ceremony, except for 4 extended family portraits. This way we got to hang out with all our guests during cocktail hour. The first look itself was fun, my H was very sweet and kept on telling me how beautiful I looked. I was less emotional than I thought I would be honestly. And lastly, you think there will be a pivotal moment as you lock eyes with your soon-to-be H as you're walking down that aisle. But if you're anything like me and get nervous in front of large crowds, you won't notice anything. All I remember was holding on to my father so tight so I didn't trip and I remember trying to capture everything, but it was very difficult. Here are a few pictures from our first look, I look pretty silly but H looks damn fine.




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