Hannah
Devoted December 2019

First look or no?

Hannah, on July 14, 2019 at 3:55 PM Posted in Planning 0 25
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Okay so I’m very torn on this... at first I was completely against a first look and so is my fiancé. In my head (and I think his too) it takes away from that huge moment when he sees me for the first time walking down the aisle to become his wife. But I’ve been reading a lot on the subject and seen where a lot of couples elect to do the first look because it saves time with pictures and they have that special moment together. So now I kind of see both sides and I’m having a hard time deciding what’s best for us. Fiancé is still pretty sure he doesn’t want one, but he could probably be convinced if I really thought it was the better option. So my question is... what are you doing and why (please give me some specific reasons to consider)?

25 Comments

Latest activity by Kristin, on July 16, 2019 at 11:01 AM
  • CourtneyBrittain
    Master August 2019
    CourtneyBrittain ·
    • Flag
    I am doing a first look because I want that moment between my fiancé and I. We are super close and are both on the same page for the first look. We also have no cocktail hour, just a 20-30 min gap after the ceremony for us to take a few more photos before we enter. We didn’t want to wait so we could have that extra time. Also, with it being an evening wedding, we wanted to see each other asap
    • Reply
  • Kelly
    VIP October 2020
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    I like first look not only because it saves time, my fiance has seen the dress, but because it creates an intimate moment between the two of us. Maybe I'm selfish or concieted but the idea I get that moment all to myself instead of sharing it with our guests really jumps out at me. I'm toying with the idea of meeting my Dad first because he's only one who hasn't seen the dress!
    Then when we walk down the isle we all get to see everyone else's expression and that's pretty fun on its own.
    • Reply
  • Mrs. S
    Master November 2019
    Mrs. S ·
    • Flag
    We are not because my fiancé really wants to wait to see me and that’s the top priority. Ive played violin at tons of weddings and I’ve seen a lot of first looks/first touches where they’re not alone and guests or family are secretly spying/openly watching which is not the point. And vendors are running around them as well. My photographer told me don’t just do it for logistics bc there will be plenty of time for the pictures we need. I originally wanted to do one just for logistics but for us it makes more sense not to do it.
    • Reply
  • Kelly
    Champion October 2018
    Kelly ·
    • Flag
    We did one so we could join our own cocktail hour and greet guests instead of taking pictures. We got to stay seated during dinner rather than running around trying to thank everyone for coming. I don’t regret it and it didn’t make walking down the aisle any less special. We both bawled as I walked down. Also our first look didn’t feel staged and no one watched it besides our photographer who was quite a ways away.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Devoted December 2019
    Hannah ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    I didn’t even think about vendors walking around and stuff! That does make sense! What’s the point if it’s not even special between the two of you? I’m still leaning towards no first look because I also for some reason really want all that anticipation building up to that moment. I know a lot of people want to see their fiancé to calm their nerves but I don’t really want mine calmed. Lol
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    VIP October 2021
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag
    NOPE! Superstitious about it. Can’t have him see me in the dress until I’m walking down aisle.
    We are planning on spending the night together before tho- and having a shower, breakfast before he goes to get ready( I get our suite!)
    • Reply
  • Jennifer
    Super September 2020
    Jennifer ·
    • Flag
    Not doing a first look because I want that moment walking down the aisle. We will have our engagement photos and cocktail hour (part of it) for photos as well as the rest of the reception - we have some photos planned for during the reception in our cocktail hour bar.
    • Reply
  • Laura
    Master October 2019
    Laura ·
    • Flag

    I'm against them. I would never take that moment from my fiancee seeing me for the first time walking up the aisle to him to become his wife. That's what we want though, if it works for another couple it's up to them. He wants that moment, it's one of the few things he has really mentioned wanting. Do what you think is best for the two of you

    • Reply
  • Cyndy
    Rockstar May 2019
    Cyndy ·
    • Flag
    This is definitely a personal decision between you and your FH. Up until 2 days before our wedding we weren’t going to do s first look and then we decided it was best. We wanted more time with our guests and he decided that seeing me alone before everyone else was more special for him. He didn’t want to cry at the altar and have to get himself together so quickly. We are so glad we did this because it was very special. We then did a few pictures together and then did a few with parents and my kids ahead of time which helped speed things along. Good luck making this decision.
    • Reply
  • Jasmine
    Master August 2021
    Jasmine ·
    • Flag

    It's really personal preference. I've thought about possibly doing one but I actually talked to my fiance earlier today on the subject. He's expressed to me that he would really rather wait and be surprised to see me in my dress for the first time as I walk down the aisle. He hasn't asked for much nor does he really offer a solid opinion on a lot so whenever he does have a solid opinion on something, I have no problem respecting his wishes.

    • Reply
  • Courtney
    Master December 2019
    Courtney ·
    • Flag

    We're not doing a first look. Instead I'm having one with my dad before he walks me down the aisle.

    To save time on pictures, we're taking our respective party photos before the ceremony then with everyone during cocktail hour.

    • Reply
  • Hillary
    Expert October 2021
    Hillary ·
    • Flag
    We are doing a first look mainly because we want that special moment to be just between us. The person who said something about guests spying on them and vendors running around seems rare to me. That would be more if you’re doing the first look while vendors are setting up and after guests have arrived. We are most likely doing ours at the hotel with just our photographer before we head to the venue for group photos and will make sure to be done long before guests arrive. We also want to get all of our photos out of the way so we can enjoy cocktail hour with our guests.
    • Reply
  • Brooke
    Expert November 2019
    Brooke ·
    • Flag
    My fiancé really didn’t want a first look. However, since our ceremony is at 5:30pm in November, by the time the ceremony is over it will be dark and difficult to take photos, so we decided to do a first look together
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Devoted December 2019
    Hannah ·
    • Flag
    Loving all these different perspectives. Jasmine, my man is the same way. He never has an opinion and doesn’t seem to care about much but he did make a decision on that and it was my gut feeling too so I’m leaning towards no first look unless it’s a logistics thing and it’s gonna rain or something after our ceremony and it just NEEDS to happen.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
    • Flag
    It's totally a personal decision. I was unsure at first too (maybe it's a Hannah thing? Lol). We have decided to do it. We both liked the idea of an intimate moment with just the two of us. We are also getting married at a country club with 2 full golf courses, and we are able to take a golf cart out all over the grounds for pictures. We liked that we can have tons of time to go around everywhere and take great pictures of just us as well as with the bridal party and our families. And we get to spend our cocktail hour with our guests, which was also a major plus.
    • Reply
  • Makenzye
    Devoted July 2019
    Makenzye ·
    • Flag
    I have always wanted to have the big moment walking down the aisle in front of all my family and friends, however when my FH and I started wedding planning we sat down with our photographer and decided to do a first look. most of his family is against this however we are doing this for us. we want to be able to have a moment together without everyone around us. also to help with our nervous and give us our special time before hand. I am really looking forward to having that time for us.


    • Reply
  • Pirate & 60s Bride
    Legend March 2017
    Pirate & 60s Bride ·
    • Flag
    Did it! Totally happy. 1) Our FAVORITE photos. We were relaxed and spent 90 minutes taking photos in our bridal suite & around the resort grounds. 2) We took very quick post-ceremony pics with family which meant we joined guests for cocktail hour. More time with guests was important. 3) Did NOT take away from our aisle walk or vows. Actually better because first look gave us a chance to emotionally connect before wedding.
    • Reply
  • Hannah
    Devoted December 2019
    Hannah ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    I do really like the idea of relaxed, non rushed pictures. Our wedding is at 4 or 4:30 in December and it will be dark by 5:30 so I gotta say it would definitely be easier before.🤷🏼‍♀️
    • Reply
  • Jess
    Super September 2019
    Jess ·
    • Flag

    We are not doing a first look. We both want the first time seeing each other to be that special moment when I'm walking down the aisle to become his wife. To save time on pictures we are doing all individual pictures before the ceremony so that after only group photos need to be done.

    • Reply
  • L
    Lady ·
    • Flag

    We didn't and I REALLY REALLY wish we would have. It would have been much more special (to me) to have that time alone with H. H was against it, which was fine - but it definitely would have made the day more special to me.

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