First look for pictures. Won't this ruin the surprise element?

It is certainly your choice and you don't have to. We did, I liked having a little time alone with DH. Also, our photog pointed out your outfit can get ruined in the blink of an eye, and it's nice to have some pics before anyone with too much makeup hugs you, or your veil falls off, or whatever. Lastly, the best pic we have of DH smiling is when he was watching me come down the aisle. Yes, he wasn't 'suprised', but he was obviously still thrilled to see me.

Tell your photographer people did it this way for decades. There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking that hour to take photos. There is also nothing wrong with doing a first look. In the end you have to decide what you want to do. When you don't see each other before, be prepared to miss your cocktail hour. If you are ok with that and really like the traditional aspect of seeing each other for the first time as you walk down the aisle then I think you have your answer (FYI I did not do a first look).

The plus side to a first look is you get to spend the entire day with your FH and you can enjoy your cocktail hour.

I am not doing a first look because we don't need to, but I haven't heard of anyone regret doing it. You and your FH will still be emotional even after a first look because you're about to get married. Your wedding starts at 7. I think you will regret NOT doing a first look. You just don't have much time for pics if you don't. But it's up to you. It will turn out fine either way.

Yea it would be nice to enjoy the cocktail hour but then it won't be a surprise when we are announced into the room. I think I'm going to stick with no first look. I want the anticipation and nerves! thank you

We're doing one. I like the idea of being able to react when you see each other- hug, kiss, talk- not just be quiet at the front of the church. I've seen beautiful pictures of the groom's reaction when he sees his bride, both during the first look and as she comes up the aisle. Plus, we'll get to enjoy more of the day together and with our wedding party and we're attending our cocktail hour. It just worked for us.

More and more couples are having a first look as opposed to the first time they see each other being at the ceremony itself. Couples I've talked to about this say they really like having that intimate time together rather than having their intimate moment witnessed by all their guests.

Either way, it's up to you of course, but many couples who forgo the 1st Look say they were so nervous coming down the aisle that their special moment wasn't as memorable as they would have liked it to be.

Personal decision. To let your photographer talk you into it if you aren't sure. FH didn't want to do a first look because he wants when I walk down the aisle to be the first time he sees me. We are doing a first touch, to have some nice pictures, not thing fancy.

We're doing a first look to not only help with time, but to get that 30 minutes or so alone together before we socialize with everyone. I think it will help our nerves too before we go on display for everyone we've known our whole lives I had an internal struggle with it too at first, but after a little while I really warmed up to the idea I think either way will be really, really special.

Do what feels best for you! I've heard arguments both ways. Some feel that they want an intimate moment without everyone staring. Others like the tradition and want to include everyone (who doesn't love seeing that moment!). The best argument I heard for doing a first look came from a friend who worked for a professional wedding photography company. He and his coworkers and watched numerous brides and grooms faint at that first moment because they had gotten so nervous and wound up. The first look lessens the nerves a bit.

However, if you don't like the idea of it. Don't do it. Make that moment special for you and your FH. You can always do pictures with a wall or door between you if pictures are needed that badly. Or both blind folded.

We are not doing it, i want him to see me when i walk down the aisle... i am doing pics with girls ahead of time since we will be getting ready at venue and have time. and only 30 minutes for some pics with me and FH during cocktail hour, then we are joining cocktail hour... all the money we paid i wanna see and taste everything.. plus he hates pictures, so we told the photographer, take pics during reception but we don't wanna see you

It's a surprise either way. It depends if you want the surprise at the first look (I've seen photos where the bride kind of sneaks up on the groom then he turns around, so he still gets the all at once look) or when you walk down the aisle. We have been debating, but I think we want to do one to take some of the pressure off and to have that moment be private (well, between the two of us and our photographer).

This helped me make my decision http://amazingdaysevents.com/the-first-look-taboo-or-to-die-for

Wow I'm actually rethinking his now due to some of your responses. This is my second marriage and we will actually have a lot of elements that are non-traditional. Lots to think about, thanks for the insight ladies!

Photographers are all on this bandwagon because it makes their job easier. Good photographers are good with night weddings.

This is my second wedding too. I would NEVER do a first look for the convenience of others. People who are coming to your wedding know it's a wedding. They know you have pictures to take between the ceremony and reception. They will get over it.

We're doing a first look because I want that special moment, just the two of us, without the stress of everyone else being there. But also because of the convenience. I know that it's always been done the traditional way and there's nothing wrong with that but I want to be able to get to our cocktail hour and get some mingling in/relax. I also don't want to feel super rushed and/or push back the reception start time. I think it also helps that we get our photographer for the day. If we were limited to a few hours I'm not sure we would have a first look because it would eat into the reception photos or something.

Mrs.ChanelNewNew, thanks for attaching that link. It puts it perfectly and I will definitely be showing FH this. While he has agreed to a First Look, I know he's not totally into it. I think this will help him understand the reasons.

We're doing a First Look because I know my FH will not give me the reaction I want due to being Mr. Anti-Emotional-in-front-of-people. He doesn't even like PDA, so I know I won't get that responses that is so important to me when I walk down the aisle.

However, it's your choice. There's nothing wrong with doing it one way or the other. Personally, the photographer should not be pushing you that hard about it. If you don't want to do a First Look, put your foot down, and say "No, I'd rather do the traditional approach of taking pics after the ceremony." That should be all you need to say.

I'm also torn on the whole first look thing. We plan to do a first prayer/touch but then I read articles like this http://amazingdaysevents.com/the-first-look-taboo-or-to-die-for and it makes me wonder if we are making a smart choice not to have that moment before the ceremony.

I am not doing the first look - it's really important to see his reaction to me as I walk down the aisle to him for the first time. My photographer knows to make sure to get that shot so I am not worried. It's all up to you and what you and FH like!