Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

VIP November 2019

fil paranoia

Laura, on September 13, 2019 at 11:17 AM Posted in Family and Relationships 0 10

Saved

Flag
Hide content

FH has an appointment near his parents’ place today and as usual will stop by to see them. They said they’d ‘talk about the wedding’ when he’s there. What?! They haven’t asked a single question about the wedding the whole 18 months we’ve been engaged. What could there possibly be to talk about?!
Heres why I’m paranoid: his parents are stupid obsessed with money. Who has it, who’s making it, who’s keeping it. I’m reasonably sure they’re going to bring up doing a prenup. And if that’s your thing that’s fine, but I refuse to plan my divorce before I get married. FH says he’ll stand strong and tell them where to stick their prenup, but I also know they can still sway him at times, or make him think about things he hadn’t previously thought of.
Am I being totally irrational here? I just c

Flag
Hide content

10 Comments

Latest activity by Laura, on September 13, 2019 at 5:08 PM

VIP November 2019
Laura · on September 13, 2019 at 11:18 AM
Flag

Hide content
Ahem
*I just can’t shake this feeling of doom surrounding this visit.
- Reply
Master February 2020
Amber · on September 13, 2019 at 11:24 AM
Flag

Hide content
I don't think you're being irrational. I would try not to stress over it considering it could be something completely unrelated, you'll just have to wait and see.
As for a prenup, that is between you and your FH. NOT his parents. They shouldn't even be having that conversation and your FH should shut it down immediately if they bring it up. It is 100% none of their business.
- Reply
Master May 2019
Cyndy · on September 13, 2019 at 12:11 PM
Flag

Hide content
I would say to relax until there is a reason to be concerned. They could want to talk about almost anything with him. Don’t worry over something that might not be true.
- Reply
Legend July 2019
MrsD · on September 13, 2019 at 12:19 PM
Flag

Hide content
I wouldn't stress prior to anything happening. I understand being worried, but deal with things as they come. It sounds like you and your fiance have discussed stuff already so there is nothing further you can do.
- Reply
Master November 2019
Mrs. S · on September 13, 2019 at 12:23 PM
Flag

Hide content
Every time people want to talk to me about the wedding and sound serious like that, they’re just nervous about something to do with themselves, like transportation hotels or outfits. I’m sure it’ll be ok.
- Reply
VIP November 2019
Laura · on September 13, 2019 at 12:31 PM
Flag

Hide content
Thanks ladies. I think it sounds like I’m borrowing trouble before it comes to my door. I dunno, maybe I am. But knowing his parents and their ways...I just have deep seated sense of dread I absolutely cannot shake. Call it a gut feeling. FH is about halfway convinced that I’m right, so we’ve gone over what he can say if they do pull some bs. He’s not a big fan of his parents so he should be able to shut it down fairly quickly.
I just would find it completely unsurprising if they are more concerned with where the money goes after the marriage than about what to wear to the ceremony, what food we’re having or a million questions ordinary parents might ask.
- Reply
Master December 2019
Cher Horowitz · on September 13, 2019 at 2:37 PM
Flag

Hide content
If his parents try to force him into a prenup, that's completely inappropriate and not their place. Hopefully they won't even touch on that topic, but try to trust that your FH will make it a decision for the two of you
- Reply
VIP November 2019
Laura · on September 13, 2019 at 4:22 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
We’ve already decided. No prenup.
And after all of that, FH got a flat tire on the way to his appointment and ended up not going to their house. Sigh. I hate dealing with his parents.
- Reply
Expert September 2021
Ka-Rina · on September 13, 2019 at 5:02 PM
Flag

Hide content
Are you relying on their finances for anything? Or is he going to inherit a lot when they pass? If that's the case I think they are not out of line.
I know appeasement is not the best way to go sometimes but he can tell them you already signed one. you don't have to show it to them. And it will never come up unless you do get divorced one day I'm all for lying if that reduces stress or gets annoying ppl off my back with things that have nothing to do with them.
- Reply

VIP November 2019
Laura · on September 13, 2019 at 5:08 PM
Flag

Hide content
View Quoted Comment
They are well off and presumably their two sons would inherit equally. Of course FH’s brother is the family golden child so an unequal split wouldn’t be surprising. But even so, I don’t see how our private marital business is their business just because he stands to inherit. They are choosing to leave their money to whoever in whatever percentages they decide. They don’t get to then dictate how it will be spent or by who.
- Reply