Is it wrong that I flat out told my fiancé I do not want 2 of his buddies as groomsmen for our wedding? I told him I do not trust them because of things that happened at his buddies bachelor party that he attended?
Unless the groomsmen did something totally inappropriate (assault/abuse, stealing from you, etc), or if they are not supportive of your relationship, I don't think it's fair to try to decide who your fiance can have in his side of wedding party. Similarly, your fiance shouldn't get to decide who you have in your side of the wedding party.
I agree with this. And if the issues you have with them are truly terrible, then you need to address that with your future spouse in the context of how his friendships are impacting your lives, not your wedding. That is, having them as groomsmen for your wedding is such a small part of the big picture of your lives.
I think it depends on the nature of your relationship. If you and fiancé communicate about each other’s friendships / associates and who you trust around each other, it’s probably fair game. If you don’t already have those convos then maybe it’s inappropriate. The question I have is why you’re worried about those groomsmen- if you think they’ll “cause” your fiancé to do something inappropriate at bachelor party, that sounds like a deeper trust issue between you and FH & maybe that’s the real convo to have with him. Also keep in mind even if they aren’t groomsmen, they could still be at the bachelor party anyway. You could propose a negotiation that instead of those 2, how would he feel about 2 other guys you feel better about- or offer to let him have his strikes of two of your bridesmaids in exchange. Ultimately I don’t think you can force him not to have them as groomsmen… just express your concerns and listen to him, and then let it go if he says no.
These buddies will be at any bachelor party if groomsmen or not, so it doesn't matter their official titles. Instead of controlling your partner's relationships, I think you should reflect why you know what happens at other people's bachelor parties in the first place. Acknowledge your anxieties, communicate with your partner, and let it go if he says no, as Mary suggests.