My fiance's friend and bestman is flying in for our wedding. My fiance told me that even after the wedding the friend will be staying a few days with us. This bugs me because it is the very start and first days of our marriage, and we'll never get those days back, so I definitely don't want to spend them sharing my time with someone else. With that said, I really don't want his friend to be staying with us right after the wedding. My fiance doesn't agree with me. Am I overreacting?
I would not be ok with this either, even if he did his own thing during the day while you had time with hubby. Your husband is still going to want to hang out with the friend and the friend will still be there at night. I think your right to want to enjoy those first few days with your new spouse. The days following my wedding are some of my favorite and i am so thankful we got that time to be together and alone.
For me, depends on which of his friends. 😂 There's one that wasn't even in the original guest list, whereas there's others that are our dear friends - and I think there has to be a root cause beyond convenience for the friend. Maybe see if something else is up, and if not then really piece out what is bothering you so you can try expressing it to your partner. Good luck!
That would be a no for me. I agree with everyone else that you want to spend those days after the wedding alone as a newly married couple. Also, my husband and I are a bit more on the introverted side, so this may not be the case for you. But, we were so drained by the end of the weekend (rehearsal dinner Friday, wedding Saturday, and breakfast in the hotel with some people who happened to be there at the same time) that we were both just....done with people for a few days. We adore our friends and family but so many cumulative hours of being the center of attention was just draining and we needed to recharge lol. I would not have had it in me to host someone in my home afterward.
That's a hard no. All of our guests came from out of town - some of them driving 12 hours - and all of them left the day after the wedding after staying in their own hotel rooms. It is inappropriate for him to think this is okay, and your FH is wrong.
My bridesmaid is staying with us before and after the wedding because she cannot afford a hotel, however my FH and I will be staying at a hotel for two nights after the wedding (for our mini-moon) to have our alone time. Maybe this is the compromise you could suggest with your FS, then the friend isn't put out, your FS can still spend some time with said friend after a couple days alone with you, and you get some alone time with your new spouse! I may be biased since my Fh and I already live together but I don't feel like it would be rude to allow your friend to stay at your home as long as they know that they aren't your priority? Does that make sense?
The friend should know how inappropriate this is. Just pure classless. I’d tell your fiancé you two are going to stay at a hotel so the friend who for whatever reason is butting in on your beginning, can have the house. Maybe then he’ll get the memo and offer not to stay. It snds like a necessary life lesson for this friend as well. I can’t believe how some People are sooooo inconsiderate!
Does it suck, yes. But is it going to ruin your newly married days, no. This is a minor hiccup in the grand scheme of things. I just found out yesterday my FH is planning on a fishing trip with his son, and 2 brothers on the day after our wedding because we will all still be at our familymoon resort. I was a little irked, but you know what, I have the rest of my life to enjoy, what's a little inconvenience.
I would not be okay with this. If he wants to stay in town after the wedding, he likely knows other people in that town that he can stay with. If you can afford to offer a hotel for him, that's very generous but totally unnecessary. I think it's right to have him stay before the wedding but after... he needs to get out.
Yeah I don't think your over reacting at all, I would feel the same way. I would want to spend the days after my wedding alone with my husband and him only.
I told mine the same thing about his cousin and his cousin tried again to weesle his way back in to the point where he asked to stay the night of our wedding at our villa... that was a solid no thankfully bc we didn’t have room in the car to drive him back 4 hrs with us the day we left the resort so he had no choice but to stay with my sister inlaw and come back with her not us. The day we got home he texted me in which I ignored asking if we were home. I simply explained to my husband this was OUR honeymoon. His cousin then texted my husband who than texted him back and told him he was spending time with me for our honeymoon so he could not stay with us. He did invite him for dinner one night but was clear just for dinner not to stay.