Hannah
Dedicated October 2020

Fear of dress shopping due to weight

Hannah, on October 31, 2019 at 11:10 AM Posted in Wedding Attire 2 42
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Is anyone/ was anyone in the same boat....

I am so excited to go dress shopping and I have found gowns online that I love....but just the thought of trying them on has me feeling sick...I have gained a lot of weight over the last few years and know that I will hate how I look...I know that I need to get moving to be sure I have my dress on time (October 2020) but I just feel like it is going to be a horrible experienceSmiley cry

42 Comments

  • B
    Super July 2018
    Brittany ·
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    This is exactly how I felt! I was always really thin growing up but in my 20s my metabolism changed and I started putting on a lot of weight regardless of how much I exercised or ate right. It was really upsetting and I didn't feel like myself anymore. I put off wedding dress shopping until 9 months before my wedding. I went alone first because I didn't want anyone to see me in something I "looked fat" in. I actually had a great experience. A-line and ballgown dresses hid my stomach and legs (where I carry most of my weight) and actually made me feel good about myself. I ended up feeling excited to bring my mom and bridesmaids back to the shop to see me in the dresses I liked. In the one I picked I felt like I wanted to show the world. Which for someone as self-conscious as me is a bigggg deal.

    So I know it's super hard to think this way, but its going to go better than you think. You'll find something that you don't see your flaws in.

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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    I have thought about going alone for my first trip, or just bringing my MoH. I love the look of A-line and Sheath gowns...I am not a huge fan of ballgowns (but that may change after I start trying things on).

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  • Lauren
    Super September 2019
    Lauren ·
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    I shopped for my dress with my mom and my sister when I was probably at my heaviest.

    Fear of dress shopping due to weight 1

    The sample size (10) didn't fit but I loved the dress anyway. My mom convinced me to order a size 10 anyway and said that I could lose the extra inches, not a good idea, I do not recommend buying a dress 2 sizes too small.

    It really gave me the incentive to change my lifestyle and eat healthier and go to the gym for cardio. In 4 month I lost 20 lbs, I was really nervous to put the dress on again at my fitting because I wasn't sure I had lost enough weight. The dress fit, and by the wedding I had lost over 25 lbs so it fit a little better.

    Fear of dress shopping due to weight 2

    Wedding dress shopping is tough. It is sweaty work and the dresses are so heavy! My advice is to try on different styles and only say what you like about the dress, don't start nitpicking your body. Good luck!

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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    Congrats on your journey and thank you for the advice!

    I was in my brother's wedding a year after having my daughter...at the fitting I ordered my BM dress 2 sizes smaller as well thinking I would just shed off the baby weight..WRONG! I still have the lingering baby weight 6 years later Smiley cry

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  • Sabrina
    Devoted April 2020
    Sabrina ·
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    I've still got lingering baby weight 11 years later, so I feel you on that. Your FH will love whatever you choose.

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  • Sarah
    Devoted June 2020
    Sarah ·
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    I am dress shopping this weekend and not at a weight I’m comfortable with but I’ve chosen to view it optimistically. If I order the dress in a size that fits me now, i won’t feel pressured to lose weight to fit into the dress. Embrace yourself and your body. You will look gorgeous either way!
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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    Thank you, I know he will...I want to be able to love myself in photos with him.

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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    Thank you, Sarah. Good luck this weekend!

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  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
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    I weighed about 15 lbs more than I wanted to when I went dress shopping, so I wasn't a huge fan of how I looked. It encouraged me to lose the weight before the wedding. You could be in the best shape of your life, and you still won't like how some dresses look on you so don't worry! Just go & know you don't have to pick a dress at the first or second or even third salon you go to.

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  • Kara
    Savvy September 2020
    Kara ·
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    I just posted something similar - I’m very curvy 36-28.5-43 and was dreading that I wouldn’t fit into the samples. I put it off as long as I could and only took my mom because it was meaningful to her. I checked websites and my measurements compulsively to be sure they had samples that would likely fit me. I finally went two days ago.

    Only 1 sample out of about 25 dresses tried on didn’t fit my hips/butt lol, most had to be clipped smaller. Both boutiques I went to the women were professional and had a pretty good eye for what will accentuate you in all the right places. Wedding gowns are smoke and mirrors . The dress I fell inlove with online , the third dress I tired on, ended up being THE dress. And at 179 lbs I fit right into that sample size 10 with room to spare (the samples are stretched from repeated people trying them on). I’ve lost 40 lbs but have another 20-30 to go.

    don’t dread it please! It ended up being a wonderful experience and I was nauseous and sick about it until the second I walked into the boutique door and met the owner.

    I ensure you you’re not alone and a good, professional bridal consultant is going to make you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world.

    Fear of dress shopping due to weight 3

    Fear of dress shopping due to weight 4
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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    Very true, I have the mindset that going dress shopping will be a fairy tale experience and I will fall in love with a gown right away, the first time...too many lifetime movies LOL!

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  • Hannah
    Dedicated October 2020
    Hannah ·
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    That is my issue as well..I am very large busted and want a dress with a high neckline, low back(low back is FH's request), and long sleeves. I feel like that is going to be hard to find with my figure without being a large ballgown

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  • Kara
    Savvy September 2020
    Kara ·
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    You might be pleasantly surprised - the proverbial “they” said A line would be great for my body type, but it made me look wider/more hippy and like a walking triangle. Also ball gowns were just too much dress for me. Fit and flare / trumpet/ mermaid was my body’s jam and I thought I could never pull that style off. As mentioned above, try on a variety of styles . You might be surprised with what flatters your shape.
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  • B
    Super July 2018
    Brittany ·
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    Yeah I wanted an exciting moment with everyone when I officially picked a dress so that's why I went alone and then brought people with me. I didn't like the real poofy ballgowns but in the middle of a-line and ballgown is what I got.

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  • Cyndy
    Master May 2019
    Cyndy ·
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    Embrace your body and try on lots of dresses of all kinds. I’m sure you will be a beautiful bride. Be confident and you will find something you love.
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  • Watts
    Super March 2020
    Watts ·
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    I am obsessed with wedding gowns but was in a depressed panic when I went to try on dresses because I'm a bigger gal (wedding size 20). It became my favorite thing! I'm telling you, I've never felt so beautiful before. Wedding gowns really make you look at yourself differently.
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  • Lisa Marie
    Devoted October 2020
    Lisa Marie ·
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    This is how I feel right now! I am going dress shopping in about 2 weeks and I am not at a weight that I am comfortable with. I've had plenty of time to make changes but nothing is working for me. If I find a dress I love when shopping in two weeks, I plan to ask what is a responsible time frame to order with enough time for alterations and go back to get it in that time frame, hopefully, a dress size smaller. I will continue to try to be healthy and alterations will have to work their magic.

    Your future spouse will love you either way and will think you are beautiful! Good luck!

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  • Kristin
    Devoted August 2018
    Kristin ·
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    I felt like you so I chose to go to a salon that specializes in plus-sized brides. Before the appointment I was sure I’d look ridiculous in anything. But the salon I chose carries sample sizes that go from 12-30+ So everything fit and I was so happy with the whole experience. Try to find one near you.
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  • Jodie
    Devoted August 2020
    Jodie ·
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    I DREADED wedding dress shopping because 1. I HATE shopping....like I'd rather get a root canal than go shopping! 2. I want to feel beautiful on my wedding day and felt like in order to find something my size I would have to go to "Ted's Tent and Awning"... I went shopping with my MOH and my mom. These are the lessons I've learned:

    1. Do your hair, makeup, wear a pretty dress...whatever you would do for like a date night. You will feel a million times better and it will give you the opportunity to see the real potential of a dress better than if you went after work all tired and blah from the day.

    2. Be upfront about the things you like and don't like. It will save you a lot of time and pressure.

    3. Take someone (or multiple people...whatever you are comfortable with) who will give you HONEST opinions. My mom was not that person. She loved everything. lol it was my MOH who would say the things I really needed to hear.

    4. If you have a firm budget tell the shop that right away so they aren't bringing you dresses that are out of your range and getting you all excited if you find one you like only to find out it is double your budget or whatever.

    5. Don't focus too much on what the dresses look like on the websites if you are checking them out beforehand. My dress looks completely different on me compared to the website. I actually didn't like the dress at first when I saw it on the website.

    6. Be open to suggestions. Try things on that you normally wouldn't. You may find some hidden gems in there!


    All in all it wasn't as terrible as I was imagining. I was able to find a dress I loved that helped give me more of a shape (other than round lol) and is absolutely beautiful! I can't wait to wear it on my wedding day!

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  • Jessica
    Expert October 2019
    Jessica ·
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    As someone who has struggled with body image and weight in the past I have to say please don't worry yourself!
    AND try on everything, especially if your dress consultant suggests it. I went in with some things I liked and found out they look horrible on me (😂). But found a dress that I absolutely loved (it looked horrible on the hanger). You will find something for you that you will love. Just have to take the first step!
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