Fatherless Bride-words of Encouragement

I say wait to decode on the dance when it gets closer. If you still have that much time you may want to do it by then. But no one will second guess if you don't have one or if you dance with your future father in law. I am so sorry for your loss though.

I am so sorry for your loss. I am always so scared of not having either of my parents there. They are my world. I cannot imagine the pain you have gone through and I truly, genuinely send you comfort.

But, all is not lost. I think dancing with your brother will be a nice commemoration for your dad. He will be watching from above, and seeing his two kids remember him in such a way will be amazing. You could even have a slideshow or some photo of you and Dad set up while the dance is going to make sure he is with you. Maybe instead of it being a father-daughter dance just make it a "commemorative" one paying your respects and love to him. I think you might regret down the road not having any kind of dance with him in mind. My best to you.

I too lost my father a few years ago. I have a much older either as well who I’m not super close with. Im not close with my fiancé’s father. My mom is walking me down and we’ll share a dance together. I’d recommend going with your heart. If you’re closer to your fiancés father, then dance with him. He’s becoming your family, I don’t think it’s weird if he did the fatherly stuff on your wedding day

I have been married twice, both times without my dad. Do what makes YOU comfortable. You can skip the father/daughter dance (I did) as it was just not something I wanted to do with someone else. Do you really want your brother to escort you? Do you have a favorite uncle or godfather? I was pushed into having my brother do it by my mom (no offense to him, I love him but I wanted an uncle) so just do what you want. If you want to share a first dance with your new FIL - go ahead!!! Best wishes to you!

So sorry for your loss. I lost my father 7 years ago & have decided that I won't be doing the "father daughter dance." My mother will be walking me down the aisle, but I just felt that I'd skip the dance all together. Plus, my mom wasn't upset because she would've been the one to dance with me. I'll just remember him with the charm on my bouquet & a special flower in the bouquet.

Thanks, ladies. The hardest part is going to all my friend’s wedddings and seeing the father-daughter dance and knowing I won’t get that chance. It almost gives me anxiety to try to figure it out, but nothing will really compare. The wedding is not until March of 19, so I’ll just give myself more and more time to open up to myself, and being honest with myself instead of ignoring it or pushing it away. Sometimes it’s just hard figuring out what makes me more comfortable. I think I would regret not filling the moment, and avoiding it instead. I just have to explore my options and self-explore as well. Figure out what’s most comfortable and force myself to remember not everyone is going to just be saying, “look her dad isn’t here.” In their heads. Thank you, ladies.

Hello! I'm in almost the exact same situation as you are. First off, I'm sorry for your loss. Weddings can be really hard with no dad. I personally am having my mom walk me down the aisle and also considered walking down the aisle along. For me personally, it just wouldnt feel right to have anyone other than my mom walk me down. I am also skipping the father daughter dance because I feel uncomfortable "replacing" someone as my dad, but this is a really personal decision. I plan on having a candle lit with a sign that says 'in loving memory of those who could not be here today' as well as having a charm on my bouquet that has a picture of us together and this saying.. 'on this special day, know that i am here walking you down the aisle, my daughter, my dear'. Do whatever you feel is right when the time comes.

Oh! Should also mention, FH will not be doing a dance with his mom (he does not want to) so we are skipping that part entirely. Not sure if thats an option for you

My sister is ten months younger than me and is getting married six months before. She is having my older brother walk her down the aisle and is skipping the father/daughter dance. I’m also having my older brother walk me down the aisle, I just don’t know if skipping the dance will be harder than changing it up. Especially since FH is dancing with FMIL.

I am also wondering what to fldo during the father-daughter dance. I was thinking of having my older brother (52) walk me in as well. I am 26. For the dance, it is still painful, but I wanted to make an effort and pick someone. I'm not sure about dancing with my future father-in-law.

View Quoted Comment I was nervous about posting this, but hearing from women with similar situations actually eases the alone feeling. Thanks for you advice.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I thankfully still have my father, but we're not doing a father-daughter dance for other reasons. I was thinking about dancing with my brother but decided to scrap the whole thing.

If you have uncles you're close to, consider dancing with them and your brother (ie them switching every little bit to dance with you).

My father also passed away a few years ago (interestingly enough, you posted this the day before his birthday!). I'm having his best friend walk me down the aisle, and his other best friend is our officiant. I've also chosen to skip the father/daughter dance, and we personally felt it would be a little odd to do the mother/son dance without it, so we're skipping that too. (Just our opinion, though!)

I went to a wedding recently whose bride also lost her father, and she actually did a mother/daughter dance, which I thought was really nice.

I absolutely understand how hard it is, and I'm so sorry. You'll make it though, and maybe consider having a photo of him on your bouquet or the back of your shoes, or you can leave a seat open for him at the ceremony.